I've been with my boyfriend a year and it's been many ups and downs. The major issue is that I have 10years on him. I am 36 and he is 26. I am ready to settle down and build a life with him. He had doubts about the relationship, which was stressful. He would love the relationship on some days but hate it on other. It was stressing me out because he would make me feel horrible. It was always issues with his indecisiveness. It was causing me a ton stress..
He is moving to Atlanta and was suppose to be moving in with me. That's change so he is plan was to just move to Atlanta and not be here with me. He was suppose to move in July, but he changed his mind when decided to stay for his basket ball team. Not for me but the team. Yes, that hurt me deeply. So asked him how he was going to do his visits he told me he would visit every now and then. It forced me to break up with him. I was very upset and hurt, but didn't want to lose him but I had to show him I was serious about him changing his plan or at least include me in the plan. Well it back fired he was happy I broke up with him because he could date other woman. That was 3 weeks ago. It has been truly horrible for me. We have been talking but it's going no where, it usually end in me flipping out and him telling me that the reason we broke up was because of my trust issues and neediness.
He went to Atlanta for a week for a wedding and to add insult to injury stayed with a female co-worker. That stressed me out beyond belief it's like he didn't care. We had at that point decide to be together but with out the stress of a relationship. So in essence he wanted me to stay with him but not give me my title back. I found my self desperate to hang on to him so I agree. When he came back I was pissed off and left him at the airport, because he was not that nice while he was away. That didn't go over well since I had his car and left him at the airport. He was totally done with me at that point but, I was so upset that he was staying with this girl.
There where a lot reasons to break up, but I feel we're a great couple and compliment each other. He has made it very clear he doesn't want to get married and he doesn't want a long relationship, but he didn't want me to live him. I haven't been the best as I am horrible at break ups, Ive called, sent mean letters and text messages. Got totally wasted after dinner and called him crying. Its a mess. I keep telling him I am done, yet I cant move pass it. I feel like he was the one for me. My 4 year loves him and he loves her. He still wants to see her, but its hard for me because I want him back. He has been wonderful for her, and he was great to me, aside from the ugly part of the relationship. I know I may need to let this go or I must let this go, but I honestly don't know how. I have had my heart broke so many times its beyond repair. I feel so empty and alone. He was totally there for me many times when I lost my house, car and job a year ago. I have totally recovered everything, but when know one else was there for me he was. Just like when he went thru a similar situation with his car, I gave him mine. I just want the love and friendship we had. I don't know what to do or how to move pass it. He seems to be fine and having fun. I am crying myself to sleep and stressed out. Please help me find a path back to a smile.... thanks in advance for any advice you can offer.