No matter our level of sexual empowerment, our partner’s experience, or our stage in life, it’s surprising how many of us still feel lost when it comes to the anatomy of a female orgasm. I am hoping to provide you with a simple directory to your body in orgasm. However, it must be read with a caveat; every woman and every body is different, so there are no set roads or definite directions that can bring you to your orgasm. Instead, this outlines more of a" Choose Your Own Adventure" type of map with one main suggestion – explore. Because of space restraints and my desire to do justice to as many destinations as possible, I have chosen to write an orgasm series, starting with the top of your body and moving down. So, let the sexual tension begin!
The Brain
Before any sexual interaction (or really any physical contact) begins, both partners should consent to the activity. Feeling safe and comfortable is not only a first step in achieving orgasm, but an incredibly crucial part of general sexual health. Of women who reported being raped, 76 percent were victimized by an intimate partner, not a stranger. (U.S. Department of Justice, 1998.) Even if you are in a committed relationship, take a minute to think and assess your feelings before beginning this journey; are you in control of your own body and actions? Are you and your partner equally invested in this orgasm and a mutually pleasurable experience?
Creating and maintaining a supportive environment for sexual activity is actually scientifically proven to “set the mood” for an upcoming climax. Before a woman is able to have an orgasm, her amygdala, the center for fear and anxiety, must be turned off; a precondition that does not exist for men. If a woman feels physically and emotionally safe, she may also feel looser or more flexible, and experience better natural lubrication. While most of the subsequent areas described in this map will be physical anatomy, always remember that consent is the sexiest part of intimacy, and the only place to start.
A quick road-side attraction/fact on the Brain, before head to the Lips in our journey towards Orgasm:
- During an orgasm, in both men and women the lateral orbitalfrontal section of the brain shuts down, causing you to lose your sense of reason and behavioral control. This means that scientifically, there is only a 5% difference between the effects of an orgasm and the effects of heroine on your brain. (The Journal of Neuroscience, 2003.)
Stay tuned!