We have been together for two years and it is serious. We are looking at houses and talking about rings and babies (mostly him, there. He really wants us to have children.). In the last six months he has stopped paying at much attention to me sexually. We still have sex and such, but when I want it.. he ignores me. It is never the other way around. Recently, he stopped being able to come when we have intercourse. I had learned a few weeks before the first time that he was watching porn and masturbating any and every time I wasn't in the room or when I was out of the apartment. I told him I don't care that he watches it, I just want our sex life to come first. I want sex with me to be his priority- not masturbating to them. I mean this, too. I have talked with him about this twice now but it still happens.. I feel so ugly and like I am not enough for him. I know that his porn is a fantasy and I try not to compare myself (though, he doesnt look at the same kinds of porn as other men. he tends to go for the bigger girls in the porn, because they have bigger breasts.. Im a little below average in weight but Im really top heavy, so Im ok in that department) but I cant help thinking that I am not enough or that something is wrong with me.
It makes me angry and depressed and I really need help dealing with this or figuring out what to do...