Have you picked your advocate yet? If not, you should! A medical advocate is someone who will speak for you if you can’t speak for yourself. That could mean you were in a car accident or had emergency surgery or just got really sick. We all hope it won’t happen to us. Choosing an advocate doesn’t mean you are expecting the worst. It just means you are smart enough to plan for the worst possible situation rather than trusting your health decisions to people you might not even know.
Here’s how it works. Start by thinking about what kind of person you would want in your corner if you were sick or injured and couldn’t make decisions for yourself or communicate what you need. I had three major components when I made my list:
• Big mouth – I want someone who is not afraid to make waves if they are in my best interest. My advocate needs to be able to speak up for me, whether it’s to ask questions, demand answers, or stand up for what he or she believes is best for me.
• Tough – I want my advocate to be able to stand up against anyone – whether it’s doctors or nurses, or even my own family members if they can’t agree. My advocate needs to stand up to authority if that’s what is in my best interest.
• Reliable – I want someone I know I can count on. The whole point of naming an advocate is to plan for an emergency. I need to know that my advocate will drop what he or she is doing to help me if needed.
You may be thinking that of course the right person for this is your spouse or partner. But before you make that decision, I want you to think about your list of requirements one more time. Can your partner really stand tough if the doctor is arguing for something else? In many cases, family members are so afraid of doing the wrong thing that they become paralyzed and can’t make a decision at all. That’s not the person you want as your advocate.
The good thing is, you can set this up however you want. You can choose someone as your advocate to be your voice, but also require that person to discuss decisions with your spouse, partner, or other family members. Just remember, someone has to be the deciding factor. Don’t expect to get the best health care based on a vote from your family!
You also need someone in charge who understands your rights as a patient and who can cut to the bottom line and get things done when you need them. You can take your advocate on a “test drive” before making the final decision by asking him or her to handle a simpler problem for you. Watch to see how effective he or she is under pressure. You’ll know when you’ve found the right person.
Once you decide who your advocate is going to be, put together your living will. This document is a guideline for your advocate and your family that explains how you want decisions to be made depending on the circumstances. It’s also where you put in writing who gets to speak for you and who they need to consult before making decisions. For more on living wills, check out the article “What Is a Living Will?.
If you can’t find someone among your friends and family, you can also choose to hire someone to advocate for you. Many work for an hourly fee. Just be sure to check him or her out carefully and do a dry run with a minor problem before you put him or her in charge of the big things. For more on patient advocates, check out Margo Corbett’s book The Savvy Patient’s Toolkit.
It all comes down to knowing yourself and making the best possible choices to protect your own health. Find the right person to speak for you so if you can’t make decisions or communicate your needs, you know your advocate will have you covered.