i have all symptoms of borderline personality disorder. so went to psychologist to check. but she said "its all in your mind, you are perfectly fine". but i continued self harming each day and have one failed attempt of suicide and still going on. help me

i have been taking overdose of paracetamol, i scratch myself everyday badly, i am scrounging for a perfect way to die but dont want it to fail this time as now am treated with frigging sweet smiles and leniency and too much care. they treat me like am some weirdo. but i love my boyfriend a lot and he loves me too. he feels hurt to see me in this condition. i want to live normal for him