There was something about her tone of voice that really intimidated me. You see the doctor that I had just hired asked me a question, “You do want your child to be socialized, don’t you?” Even though I heard this term alot in college, I had not associated it with my own loved ones. So I didn’t really know how to answer her. I felt uninformed and very much like I had missed an important tenant of parenting somehow. Being one of the best in her field was why I sought her out after all. But not only was she l-a-t-e for our initial appointment, she made no effort to even apologize. She made it clear that she was the VIP (and not us) and was giving a speech to a prestigious group the very next day. She had one of her interns take my baby into another treatment room while we talked, and I complied. She asked me to wait outside while she examined my child and again I ignored my instincts. I tried calling my husband’s cell but couldn’t reach him for input. Then I heard my newborn screaming and went into the room without permission. The doctor informed me that she needed me to stay outside. I ignored her as my child’s cry finally caused my parental instincts to start kicking in. The fear that struck my newborn and I was paralyzing. We sat and hugged each other so tight, and for a long time before heading home. I cannot tell you why I allowed her authoritarian presence to replace my common sense, but I did. And because of this an other growth opportunities like it, I relate well to parents who seem to go numb when an alpha-pathologist is speaking to them: whether this person has their child's best interest at heart or not. This reminds me of the morning I went to enroll my son in the public high school near our home… But that’s a story for another day.
Thanks for letting me vent in this forum. It sure would be nice to know if anyone else can relate to me. I'd love to hear from you. Take care. :)
There's a fearles parent in all of us. Seen yours lately?
Adelaide Zindler, FP (Fearless Parent)
www.FearlessParenting.com