There's a lot to think about if you are getting a divorce. And there's a lot that you may not know. You may not be at your best, mentally or emotionally. But you need to be able to get a grip, and be clear-headed.
Many important changes are going to take place, and you need to make solid decisions. If you have children, it's essential. This is going to require gathering good advice, doing indepth research, and developing a whole lot of self-control.
Let's look at some of the things you may not know, and what you can do about them.
1) Talk to an Attorney
You've now entered new and unfamiliar territory, where seemingly inconsequential actions and words may have powerful consequences after all.
Consulting a lawyer, whether you use one for the actual divorce or not, can be illuminating, and may help you to protect yourself.
2) Don't Budge From Your Home
If you move out, you may forfeit your right to alimony, or you may end up paying alimony. You may be prevented from going back in until after your property has been divided by the court, which can take longer than one year.
The exception to this is if your partner is violent. Then you must put your and your children's safety first. If you need to leave, pack up and go.
3) If You've Had an Affair ...
Even if you'd like to clear your conscience with your soon-to-be ex-partner, doing so might cause problems with the divorce. It could have an effect on whether you can get alimony, for instance, or it may affect the amount.
4) You May Feel Sad or Depressed
You might think your partner is the biggest jerk who ever lived, but be prepared for the possibility that you could feel more than just relief. You may be in mourning for the failure of your relationship, for the relationship that can never be.
You might lose friends. Things for, and with, your children may be difficult.
You may have mixed feelings about being single again. You're gaining a new life, but in the process you are losing your old one, not only the bad but also some of the good.
5) Everything Will Be Different