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Not Having Enough Sex? You are not Alone...

 
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It seems as though fewer and fewer couples are having sex nowadays-- so much so, that in the 1950's married couples were having more sex than today. An estimated 40 million Americans are involved in a sexless marriage.

Here are some surprising reasons why your sex life has hit a wall-- and how to fix it:

Your bed isn't sexy anymore.
While this doesn't mean "put some lingerie on your bed" it means to stop bringing laptops, newspapers, cell phones, and televisions into your bed and/or bedroom. In earlier years, people used their bed to sleep and sleep only. Today, many couples spend way too much time in bed and not enough time out of it to even see it as a sexy place to have sex in. Try kicking the habit of doing everything in bed and make your bed appear "sexy" again.

Your meds are stealing your sex drive.
Unfortunately many oral contraceptives, anti-anxiety medications, anti-depressants and blood pressure medicines can certainly take a toll on your sex drive. Ask your doctor about the sexual side effects of your drugs.

Your crazy-busy life.
You work all day, come home and cook, clean, fix something that broke, and/or take care of the child(ren). Then it's time to head to bed and exhaustion gets the best of you. Take a nice warm bath and add a few drops of ylang-ylang essential oil; the aroma is thought to heighten sexual feelings.

You don't like your body.
This is pretty self-explanatory-- many women feel they should look a certain way in order to have a great sex life. Ask your significant other what he likes about your body. If that isn't enough-- shed some pounds! A five pound weight loss is a sure way to boost your confidence.

You've hit perimenopause.
Before menopause, hormonal shifts -- specifically decreasing estrogen -- lead to physiological changes that can make sex seem less and less appealing. Sensitive vaginal tissues become less lubricated, the ensuing dryness leads to pain, and painful sex quickly turns into no sex. Talk to your doctor about the pros and cons of Hormone Replacement Therapy-- KY lubricant can certainly help with vaginal dryness.

Your man's just not that into it.

Add a Comment1 Comments

EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

Lose five pounds? Gee, what woman would have ever come up with the idea of becoming thinner to solve her relationship problems? What an insightful and imaginative article. I feel empowered!

May 6, 2011 - 8:00pm
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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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