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Some Common Misconceptions About Sex

 
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A lot of people have misconceptions about sex that prevent them from really enjoying it. A lot of other people have misconceptions about sex that allow them to really enjoy it, but prevent them from being really safe about it.

The following are some misconceptions about sex that may prevent you from enjoying it:

• Your body must be perfect.
This could not be more of a misconception. When it comes to sex, beauty truly is in the eye of beholder. One of the most liberating things for many people has been to go to bed with a partner who thinks they are not only attractive, but gorgeous, and who can’t even imagine why they would ever feel insecure about their chest, thighs, backside, etc.

Being with someone who lusts after you whether you’re a 90-pounder or a 290-pounder can be one of the most pleasurable, empowering and validating experiences imaginable.

• Your technique must be flawless.
This is a huge, albeit often under-discussed, area of myth and insecurity for everyone. So many of us think that if we aren’t Don or Donna Juan in the boudoir we will come across as total losers, and we deprive ourselves of some pretty wonderful experiences.

Usually, people who want to have intimate pleasure are more than willing to explain, explore, talk, show, demonstrate things to you that will make them feel good. You are also free to demonstrate, move a partner’s hand up or down, whisper “more” or “too much there.”

In fact, people have actually been known to fumble and laugh in bed. Fancy that.

• You must be madly, hopelessly in love.
Well, while many of us grow up imagining this would be the perfect way to make love, in reality you can still have respectful, loving, warm and deeply erotic sexual activity without being in love at all.

As long as both parties are consenting adults, safe and sane, there is no reason not to engage in the frolic of your life without getting married or buying a home together. Having safe fun is a wonderful part of the human experience, and one of the only deeply intimate experiences left to us.

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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