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Why Do People Have Sex Dreams?

By HERWriter
 
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why do you have dreams about sex? Steve Lovegrove/PhotoSpin

Sex dreams can be erotic and intriguing or just plain weird. If your sex dreams leave you baffled, you're not alone.

We dream because of the constant intense activity in our subconscious minds, said NetDoctor.

And since sex is one of the most powerful human drives, it's not surprising that many dreams have sexual content.

If we have deep urges, they are likely to manifest in our dreams – where our consciences can’t stop them.

There are differences in opinion when it comes to sex dream interpretation.

Sex dreams could represent aspects of ourselves we’ve been ignoring or neglecting, wrote DivineCaroline.com. Or it might be simply be due to the fact that we haven’t had sex in a while and our libidos are reminding us.

Carol L. Cummings, author of "The Sex of Your Dreams: Erotic Dreams and Their Hidden Meanings," told DivineCaroline.com that erotic dreams “tend to be based on wish fulfillment.” She believes they are healthy ways to release sexual energy we can’t act on in real life because it would be inappropriate.

What about when people have sex dreams about someone they’re not attracted to like a boss, co-worker or friend?

DivineCaroline.com wrote in Gillian Holloway’s "The Complete Dream Book," offering three potential reasons why we dream about people we find unattractive.

The first reason could be that the person we dream about could represent characteristics we’re trying to develop in our own personalities.

A second possibility is the dreamer is making a bad choice.

The last reason is you’re entering into another kind of partnership with your dream subject, such as a business relationship.

Other sex dreams can include an ex-lover or complete stranger.

EverydayHealth.com said that according to Ian Wallace, a dream psychologist, if you’re dreaming about an ex-lover, it could mean you’re unknowingly repeating bad habits from your failed relationship.

Ladies Home Journal said however, that an occasional glimpse of a past love is usually nothing more than mental vacation from everyday life.

If the stranger in your dream has no face or is wearing a mask, your subconscious may be telling you to unmask talent you’ve been hiding, Wallace told EverydayHealth.com.

It may also mean you’re uncovering qualities you want in a partner. Ladies Home Journal added that sex dreams with strangers may signal a wish to break out of a romantic rut.

Self.com wrote that although it's dismissed by some experts as unreliable, dream interpretation is gaining credence among researchers and therapists as an intuitive tool. Many practitioners say that determining what your dreams symbolize can help improve your life, especially your sex life.

Ladies Home Journal said that the next time you're mystified by a particular dream partner, think about what qualities that person represents and why you might be drawn to them.

Sources:

Blackwell, Elizabeth. "What Do Your Sex Dreams Mean?" Ladies' Home Journal - beauty and fashion advice, easy recipes, and sound marriage advice from LHJ. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012.
http://www.lhj.com/health/sexual/what-do-your-sex-dreams-mean

David Peden, Lauren. "What your sex dreams really mean: Health: Self.com." SELF Magazine, nutrition, health and advice: Self.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012. http://www.self.com/health/2007/06/decoding-your-sex-dreams.

Dr. Delvin, David, and Christine Webber. "Sexual dreams." NetDoctor.co.uk - The UK's leading independent health website. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012.
http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/sex_relationships/facts/sexualdreams.htm

Kerns, Katie. "What Do Your Sex Dreams Mean? - Sexual Health Center - EverydayHealth.com." Health Information, Resources, Tools & News Online - EverydayHealth.com. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012.
http://www.everydayhealth.com/sexual-health/what-do-sex-dreams-really-mean.aspx

Santillano, Vicki. "Awkward! Why We Have Sex Dreams About Random People - DivineCaroline." DivineCaroline: Relationships, Body & Soul, Home, Style, Parenting, and Community for Women - DivineCaroline. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012.
http://www.divinecaroline.com/22201/95523-awkward-sex-dreams-random

Seppala Ph.D., Emma M. "Sex Dreams | Psychology Today." Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/dream-catcher/201109/sex-dreams

Triffin, Molly. "Sex Dream Meaning - What Do Sex Dreams Mean - Cosmopolitan." The Online Women's Magazine for Fashion, Sex Advice, Dating Tips, and Celebrity News - Cosmopolitan. N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Nov. 2012.
http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/what-your-sex-dreams-mean#slide-1

Reviewed November 8, 2012
by Michele Blacksberg RN
Edited by Jody Smith

Add a Comment1 Comments

EmpowHER Guest
Anonymous

To dream about sex represents the integration or merging of different aspects of your personality in waking life experience. If you are the one having sex this most likely reflects a positive or pleasurable experience that you are having in waking life. Whomever you have sex with represents a quality your noticing in yourself or a situation that you are experiencing.

For example, if you have sex with a celebrity it may symbolize a quality you see in that celebrity coming out of you or enjoying an activity you associate with that celebrity. [Source: DreamBible.com]

April 3, 2013 - 11:26am
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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.

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