Improved
6112 HealthChanged
3786 LivesSaved
3568 Lives0 lives impacted in the last 24 hrs Learn More
I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE ANY HELP. HERE IS MY STORY... I HAVE BEEN WITH MY BOYFRIEND FOR THE PAST 2 YEARS. IN THE BEGINNING OUR RELATIONSHIP WAS A BLAST HE ALWAYS GAVE SO MUCH OF HIMSELF AND ALWAYS PUT MY NEEDS FIRST. WHEN IT CAME TO THE SEXUAL SIDE OF THINGS, WELL BECAUSE OF THEY WAY I WAS RAISED AND ALSO MY PERSONAL BELIEVES WE NEVER WENT FURTHER THAN PLEASING EACH OTHER MANUALY, BUT IN THE HEAT OF THE MOMENT INTERCOURSE DID HAPPEN A FEW TIMES.
WE MOVED AWAY FROM HOME ABOUT A YEAR AGO TO BASICALLY START OVER IN OUR JOBS EXCTR...
I AM NOW AT A POINT IN OUR RELATIONSHIP WHERE I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE THING FURTHER AS I LOVE HIM AND WOULD LIKE TO HAVE A FILLING SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP.
I KNOWS THAT BUT STILL SHOWS VERY LITTLE INTRESS IN ME. OF COURSE THIS HURTS MY FEELINGS SO MUCH AS I THOUGHT THIS IS WHAT HE WANTED.
I RECENTLY DESCOVERD THROUGH SELF CONFESSION FROM HIS SIDE AFTER CONFRONTATION FROM ME. THAT HE REGULARY WATCH PORN AND MASTURBATE.
WORDS CAN'T DESCRIBE MY FEELING OF DISCUSS AND HURT!
AND ALL ALONG I BLAMED IT ON HIS WORK STRESS OR ON MYSELF. I FEEL CHEATED AND BETRAYED AND FEEL LIKE I WILL NEVER TRUST HIM AGAIN.
I CAN'T UNDERSTAND HIS REACTION. IS THIS NORMAL? AM I OVER REACTING? PLEASE ADVISE AND NO THERE IS NO ONE ELSE OF THAT I AM SURE.
All user-generated information on this site is the opinion of its author only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions. Members and guests are responsible for their own posts and the potential consequences of those posts detailed in our Terms of Service.
Add a Comment83 Comments
DEAR LADIES THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE COMMENTS! I RESPECT ALL YOUR VIEWS AND IT SERTAINLY MAKES ME FEEL BETTER KNOWING I AM NOT ALONE.
August 7, 2009 - 10:58pmMY PERSONAL OPINION ABOUT PORN IS VERY MUCH THE SAME AS RLYONS. I FIND IS ABSOLUTELY DISCUSTING, SICK AND DEGRADING!SO NO I WILL NEVER ALLOW IT IN MY RELATIONSHIP.
AS FAR AS THIS MATTER GOES I HAVE SPOKEN TO HIM AND TOLD HIM YOU MUCH IT HURTS AND EMBARESS ME.
HE PROMISED TO NOT DO IT AGAIN AND AS FAR AS I KNOW HE HAVEN'T SINCE( NOV LAST YEAR)
HOW EVER HE DID CONFESS TO STILL MASTURBATING AND HIS ONLY EXCUSS IS THAT EVERY SINGLE GUY OUT THERE DOES IT!
I STILL CAN'T UNDERSTAND THIS NEED OF HIS? HE ALSO ADMITS THAT IT IS NOT ME BUT THAT HE FEELS VERY UNCONFADANT AND THAT HE DOESN'T MEET UP TO MY STANDARDS.
SAYING ALL THIS I DO HAVE HIGH STANDARDS AND THAT WILL NOT CHANGE. I FIND HIS MASTURBATION WRONG AND UNEXCEPTABLE! I JUST WONDERED WHAT YOU LADIES THINK OF HIS REACTION THAT ALL MEN DO IT AND THAT MEN ALWAYS WILL? APPARENTLY IT IS A GUY THING!
I REFUSE TO BE SECOND IN ANY MANS LIFE!
ANOTHER THING IS THAT I NOW REALLY STRUGGLE TO FORGIVE HIM ABOUT PRIVIOUSLY WATCHING PORN! I DON'T LOOK AT HIM WITH THE SAME EYES ANY MORE AND FEEL CHEATED.
BUT I REALLY REALLY DO TRY AND ALSO TRY AND SUPPORT HIM WITH HAVEING THIS MAJOR WORK STRESS.
AS I FIND THIS AND HIS LACK OF CONFIDANCE TO BE THE BIGGEST REASON HE PREVERS MASTURBATION ABOVE ME.
IF THIS DOESN'T CHANGE SOOS HE WILL NOT BE APPART OF MY LIFE MUCH LONGER.
I JUST REALLY NEED SOME FEEDBACK FROM THE LADIES OUT THERE AS I KNOW I AM NOT THAT EXPERIENCED IN THESES MATTERS.
This Comment
OMG what are you 12 years old? seriously everyone masturbates at some point in their life ok. IF they don't then oftentimes they are lying.Its natural it feels good who cares..!! omg if you want talk to him and join him don't sit there in your medieval mindset and think.."oh god that's so disgusting!.."uhm seriously grow up and let him be a male. As a female i masturbate daily.. why? because it feels good life is short and i'm not hurting anyone.Obviously you aren't that experienced in these matters you type like you are 12 years old and you speak like you have lived in a convent your whole life. Good grief open your eyes and live a little... holy shit!
September 22, 2009 - 11:10amThis Comment
Your boyfriend needs to run for the hills, seriously.
September 13, 2009 - 1:10amThis cannot be real, you have to be kidding.
This Comment
I find your spelling, grammar, and use of of all capital letters to be sick and disgusting. I also feel as though your post is far more degrading to the English language than pornography is to women.
September 10, 2009 - 1:36pmThis Comment
thank you, jesus christ, I was wondering when someone was going to mention the fact that this woman who apparently has been living under the no masturbation rock can't even spell disgusting. I agree, the integrity of the english language has suffered a greater blow here than anything
September 12, 2009 - 9:18amThis Comment
wow. thank you so much. seriously, is her caps lock broken or something? i wasn't even as concerned about the issue she raised when I attempted to decode her terrible english grammar. but to the issue she brought up, if she has these "high standards," and i am pretty sure that her boyfriend is aware of this, of course he is going to feel unconfident, especially if he has tried to fulfill her sexual fantasies. you cant be so goddamn angry about someones supposed "impotency" if you dont do shit about it. seriously, whoever wrote this is just a high maintenance bitch who is more concerned about the "sexual relationship" more than the actual relationship itself. then theres something wrong when sex overpowers almost every emotion OTHER than anger. besides, its not like hes been fucking around with actual women. get the fuck over it or for gods sake, let the poor man find someone who doesnt threaten and bitch the shit out of him.
February 12, 2010 - 7:47pmThis Comment
hey there. masturbation is completely normal. its not sick or disgusting; i wouldnt expect him to stop. i take it to mean you dont masturbate, yourself; but look, sometimes you just know what you want, and how you want it, and dont want to bother with someone else giving it to you. masturbation is fun, free, and healthy; it improves circulation, boosts immune function, and helps promote libido, ie the more you o it, the more sex you want. so, i wouldnt give your guy a hard time (no pun intended), i would *join* him!
August 17, 2009 - 12:15pmThis Comment
hi scarlet24,
my boyfriend and i have a great sex life bit he does watch a little bit of porn and maturbates, but that is just when we havnt been able to have sex for a while or i havnt seen him. its just to relieve himself when im not there for a little while. but he is still 100% interested in me and having sex with me also.
i think that if your boyfriend prefers masturabtion to porn than having sex with you, or just masturbates and never has sex with you then i think that more than just relieving himself. especially if you live together! i think you need to have a real talk with him about how you feel and how this is not only effecting you but your relationship. if he doesnt respond... then i dont think he will be changing quickly.
i dont want to tell you to break up with him, or stay with him.. because that is ultimatley your decision and youll base that on how you feel. but do talk to him and see how he responds and if anything changes.
i think a relationship can involve a little porn (mostly on the mans side), but only to reliev himself if you are not around for say a week or more. but i dont belive a relationship can work if porn is replacing you.
August 7, 2009 - 6:37pmThis Comment
seriously, drop that piece of useless meat. or, spice his world up and show what he's missing out on.
August 17, 2009 - 4:14pmThis Comment
Rlynos: Addiction: compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly : persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful. as defined by merriam-webster dictionary. watching porn to get off is not an addiction. yes I understand that some con become addicted to internet porn however it is very unlikely.could it possibly be that your "porn addicted boyfriends" were just not into YOU? scarlet24 like I said in my earlier post if you are unhappy in your relationship then it needs to change even if it includes asking your boyfriend to stop watching porn, however I do recommend that you do mot listen to any one who says that anything is bad all the time or to anybody that goes around spouting feminist bull. go luck in your relationship. Anonymous I am a real woman and I guarantee that my porn loving boyfriend is not impotent, listless and unhappy with me or our sex life.
August 7, 2009 - 2:38pmThis Comment