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Can someone help me with this embarrassing situation?

By Anonymous June 24, 2010 - 4:02am
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Last week, I went to my gyne for my check up. He's a male Dr and I've been going to him for years, I'm 40 yrs old. Well, this visit I didn't have time to use the bathroom before hand and while I was sitting in the exam room waiting, I felt the urge to urinate getting worse. The Dr came in and I asked him if I may use the bathroom, but he said I'd be fine, he would make the exam go quickly. Well, as I was laying down, he put his fingers in and pushed on my abs, and I was getting so scared I was about to urinate. He then told me to relax so he could feel inside and as I went to do that, it was too late. I began urinating all on him and the floor. I was horrified! He then actually said he couldn't believe I did that. I told him how sorry I was, but I think he was actually really upset with me. Now I never want to go back. What shoud I do? And has this ever happened to anyone else?

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I'm not sure if this helps or not, but my friend was horrified that she had a bowel movement in front of her doctor and other health care personnel as her legs were in the stirrups, pushing to deliver her baby. She had not heard of this happening to other women, but it makes sense, and further "proof" that doctors really are used to bodily fluids!

I am so sorry this happened! I am also surprised that if you told him you needed to go to the bathroom, that he would proceed to do a pelvic exam and push on your abdomen and not expect you to urinate. I do like Diane's response, if you are able to muster up the courage to say it! (Practice in the mirror, and he will likely find it humorous as well!)

I agree with everything Diane said. He does not sound like he has the best bedside manner, but if you have been seeing him for a long time and like/trust in him, continue to see him.

I have to tell you...I have been seeing my OB/GYN for a few years, and was always a little nervous about the pelvic exam and feeling self-conscious about it. Then, she recently delivered my baby and I could not believe all of the bodily fluids that gushed out of me...she and the attending had to literally duck to not be soaked! After that, I am no longer embarrassed or self-conscious about what she may be seeing during a pelvic exam/pap smear, or what bodily fluids are coming out at the time. The gynecologists really have seen it all, and I may even guess that urine is probably the least worrisome to them, of all the bodily fluids. :)

June 24, 2010 - 1:23pm


I am so sorry this happened to you. But here's the deal -- I cannot BELIEVE that when you asked to urinate, he didn't immediately tell you where the restroom was! He's a gynecologist, he knows how things work down there, and when you asked to go, he should have let you go. End of story.

But he didn't, and it happened. So my next point is this: gynecologists deal with all kinds of bodily fluids all the time. Women have pelvic exams, sonograms and babies; they can inadvertently urinate in any of those situations. Doctors and nurses handle this all the time. He could have been much more graceful about it. All he had to do was say "I'm sorry I didn't trust what you said! Don't worry about it."

The fact that he was nonplussed about it enough to say that he "didn't believe you did that" makes me think he just didn't know what to say, and that's what popped out.

If you like this doctor, I would continue going to him. By the time it's time for your next exam, he will have done sonograms, delivered babies and probably have forgotten the whole thing anyway. If he hasn't, and he says something, just come back with a totally off-the-cuff comment like, "Hey, I TOLD you I had to go! Next time you'll believe me!" and chuckle afterward. (Even if it seems a little fake to you. It will get you past the moment.)

If you're not crazy about him, then maybe it's time to switch doctors. But don't do it just because you were embarrassed. In the scope of your world, this was huge, but in the scope of his world, it wasn't.

And I bet next time someone tells him they need to go to the bathroom, he'll listen!

June 24, 2010 - 9:51am
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Urinary Incontinence

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