I am not sure my boyfriend is attracted to me. Please help!!!

Out of the blue for you, possibly. However, he's been thinking about it for a long time. I'm 17 years in and it's all that's been on my mind for the past 2 years.
I love our life, I 100% hate her lack of sensuality and desire to fulfill my needs.
We have a child. I'm in it until we've raised a strong, confident, and independent person... Cannot say for sure what'll happen after that, but my requests aren't unreasonable, and I really feel like it's all her undoing.

Omg!!! It seems as if I am you write this post. I am going thru the exact situation. Please do tell what outcome have you had if any.

Did you ever figure this one out? I feel as though I could have written this comment, basically every detail rings true with me. I've been trying to figure out how to interpret my situation/what to do.

I know some of the posts are really old, but hopefully I can help someone by sharing my experience. I was married for almost 8 years with exactly one of these partners that you describe here. I was 21 and he was 24 when we got married and bc of the culture and going to church thing we didn't have sex before marriage or any other type of sexual touching besides regular kissing. We got married and he was never into me. 8 years of bagging for sex exactly the same bs excuses. The problem was 4 months after marriage I caught him going to prostitutes. And all of the years he was on and off struggling with porn, prostitutes, accounts on hooking up sites, masturbating 5 times a day over Craigslist adds of prostitutes....I finally left him after 8 years. I never felt so humiliated and worthless. From my experience these men have some type of sexual addictions even if it's just masturbating. Training your brain to get arroused over porn or masturbation will leave you insensitive to the real thing. These men have no problem getting hard or wanting sex under the "right" conditions. The problem is we are not that. On top of that is the guilt and feeling disgusted by themselves. This is not normal ladies. These men are sick and will mess up with your self esteem big time, with your worth, your feminity, will make you torture yourself what's wrong with you and make you lose sleep and give you depression. They have some other stuff on the side that they deal with and don't want to be bothered. They are addicted to porn and other things besides normal like a man and a woman laying in bed next to each other cuddling and making out will turn them on.
Before I divorced my ex I found him on a hooking up site and got myself a fake profile and entertained him for over 18 hours straight with talking. So he told me in that conversation (thinking I'm just a hooker) that goes wife is good looking but is in his DNA to look for other women and all what he always wanted is to experience with all sort of different bodies. Here also said he's looking for quality sex (from the hookers ) and that he's very sexual and needs a lot of sex (although he seemed he never had sex on his mind while we were together). That was enough for me to go straight to court and divorce him.
After divorce I dated a lot of men who told me how good looking and smoking hot I am and built my self esteem. Now I'm with my boyfriend of 2 years and he always calls me "sexy beast" and princess and beautiful and sexy. Here just told me last night that he's very happy that he gets turned on by me as soon as he touches me or kisses me.
Living my ex was the best decision of my life. I have a special needs son with him and had no job and no nothing when I left him but I was so devastated I told myself I don't stay with him any minute longer even if I end up homeless. Well I never ended up homeless I got a degree in medical field since then and I met a very good man who now is my bf and he is a million times better looking than my ex and sexier with a 6 pack and defined muscles all over. My bf cherish me and praise me and gets involved in raising my special needs son.
Especially those of you who plan on marring these sexually unavailable men, make yourself a favor and think this through. If he s not attracted to you in your 20s or 30s he won't get turned on by you in your 50s. They battle their own demons and you are the one who pays the price. He's getting he's needs met some other way, I'm not saying he's physically cheating but he watches porn or masturbates or both our has his own fanthesis that you are not a part of. Don't waste your time with this kind of men. You are not getting more younger and more beautiful than this. if a man doesn't enjoy you now and appreciate you now he's not gonna write you poems 10 years down the road about how beautiful and sexy you are. As women we have needs and this is essential to us as the man we sleep with to praise us and think we are damn sexy. Begging for sex and feeling unwanted and insecure is not every woman's dream.
To want to have sex with your woman should be natural. Struggling with trying and forcing yourself to want it it's just a shame.

This sound like you're describing my relationship ! I managed to get him to go to counselling which helped a bit but then we stopped going ( as the councillor thought we didn't need it anymore) but it's gone back to the way it was. Him masturbating and not wanting sex. When we met I felt attractive now I feel terrible and feel like there's no point trying to be feminine etc around him. When we do have sex I have to initiate it,because I'm at my wits end waiting for him to come to me, and I feel like I'm just a body to use for the equivalent of masterbating rather than his hot girlfriend he wants to fuck. My ex was a piece of shit , complete opposite of my current boyfriend, but at least he made me feel on top of the world about my body.
We've talked about the issue so much but nothing helps- apart from me getting used to it and not expecting to have sex.

I have personally gone through the same thing over and over. My suspended fiancé and I started off hot and heavy then in under a month sex dropped off to 1-2 a month. He would flirt and grope and leave with no interest in sex several times a day and ignore me when I would wear lingerie. He would brush me off when I initiated and would say "I had a doughnut" when he wouldn't have an erection. When he did initiate it was like doing laundry, no passion just a chore. I am a very fit 38-21-38 with transparent skin, maridah'a hair, and a good face(did modeling). He was having some ED issues which is fine, then I found out that although I have the shape he likes everything else about me is not his preference. He would fantasize about other women every time he was with me and began masterbaitimg to porn 3x a day when his fantasies started to run out. Here is the thing, if a man is using the fantasy part of his brain (watching porn is there too)and rewarding himself with strong chemical reactions that part of his brain is what triggers his sexual desire, not physical people because he hasn't worked out that brain muscle. Men, regardless of what they say place themselves in the scene with the woman, it is scientifically proven. It is more about emotional escape, intimacy avoidance and long term habits. By doing this they do not build healthy emotional bonds with their real partner, are less attracted to them, objectify women, feel sexually inadequate while engaging in physical sexual activity, and suffer from porn induced ED, which can happen with fantasy masterbaition as well. My ex-husband used porn, his genre escalated (which is common) and he became sexually violent with me. My ex-fiancé became addicted (also common) and is now on sexual detox from his therapist. He has intimacy issues from his parents and was sexually abused by his ex-wife, who criticized his performance and his penis. Although he loves me and thinks I'm attractive he admits that he finds curvy Hispanic women very attractive and his actions were separate from me. He also thought that he was being a good partner. He knows now by engaging in selfish pleasure, neglecting my needs, projecting, and judging me he was not. Most importantly he now sees that criticizing any part of a female is equivalent to having his penis criticized. He is getting the physiological help he needs for his past and for his addiction habits, and learning how to deal with depression and stress in a more healthy way. I have moments that I understand it has nothing to do with me, in those moments I am firm and say "This is your issue and if I'm the person you want to be with then you need to take care of it before you even consider coming this way. I refuse to live the rest of my life feeling unloved by someone I adore who should hold me just as high, it is unfair to everyone." On my bad days I have a list of all the medical procedures, workouts, and cosmetic things I need to do to be noticed, loved and desired. I realize this can be very damaging, can last the rest of my life, I might never feel secure, but I know I'll have good days too, and I love his so very much even through all the pain. I hope this gives insight.