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My husband doesn't want sex with me unless he's been drinking

By Anonymous January 18, 2013 - 12:33am
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I have been married to my husband for almost 7 years. At the beginning everything was great. He went on Welbutrin for awhile and hasn't been on them for over a year now. I know that Welbutrin can lower your sex drive, but it has been a year now and nothing has changed. He still doesn't want me sexually anymore. I can count on both my hands how many times we have been intimate this way (and still have some fingers left) in the past 3 years. Everytime I even act like I want sex he pushes me away. He literally gets mad sometimes and I just walk away. The only times we have had sex has been when he has been drunk and even then, it is not enjoyable to me at all. I haven't gained any weight (in fact I've lost some) since we have been together. I cook, clean, take care of our 3 kids, do everything he asks me to do, and still nothing. He isn't cheating on me, so I know that isn't the problem. He's a good man and a great father, but I honestly feel like we are just roommates instead of husband and wife. I'm not ugly, or fat, or anything. My personality is still the same as when we married but there is no romance or love there anymore. I care about him deeply but it just seems that no matter what I do, he just doesn't want me anymore. Help.. I don't know what to do and it's killing me inside.

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EmpowHER Guest

Hi Anon,

Welcome to EmpowHER.  Sorry to hear how you feel, am sure it's not easy.  Excessive alcohol use can lower his sex drive or libido.  You should speak to your husband and let him know how you feel.  He needs to see his doctor and explain what is happening.  Also, psycho therapy might be good for him and the relationship.

Best of luck,


January 18, 2013 - 4:59am
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