My third pregnancy resulted in a twin pregnancy. I was shocked and scared, but cautiously optimistic. Our youngest at the time was only 11 months, so in doing the math, I realized quickly that life was about to get very crazy, very quickly. At 11 weeks we found out we had lost one of the babies...it was devastating and threw me into a deep depression that is hard to explain. I was unhappy to still be pregnant if it meant I couldn't have both my babies; I wanted the other one to simply disappear too. My body couldn't carry the second baby, so what was wrong with me? What did I do wrong? It would take nine months of a high risk pregnancy and lots of soul searching before I could come to terms with the answer; it was a blessing in disguise.
From the very first appointment my blood pressure was elevated. I hadn't experienced high BP before getting pregnant, that I knew of, but it was of little concern to me. I had been unable to find much happiness in the pregnancy news since it was unplanned and I had zero insurance. I had been stressed about finances and how we would recover from this life changing experience, and how in the world I was going to deal with ANOTHER baby on top of the one I had just had not that long ago. It was bad timing, and I was mad at myself for allowing this to happen. High blood pressure is nothing to scoff at, and deep down I wanted to just not think about it in the hopes that all of this pregnancy stuff would go away. I would begin skipping doctors appointments because I just didn't care enough about my body to go, plus I didn't have the money for a visit each and every month. I had done this before, I knew the drill; pee in a cup, blood pressure, etc. and I didn't think it was that big of a deal to not go to the appointments. When I neared the end of the pregnancy, my feelings began to change. I started having anxiety and panic attacks and believing that I was going to die during child birth. I didn't tell my doctor any of this, because I didn't want to come off as crazy, but my body was trying to tell me something and I wasn't sure what. My blood pressure hit an all time high at 35 weeks and my doc sent me directly to L&D to be monitored. My BP not only went down during this monitoring period, but went down to normal...which it hadn't been in 7.5 months. I thought I was going to be induced...felt it was necessary...but my fears were controlling me and I prayed to just be sent home. That's what they did, told me to go home and follow up with a MFM specialist that week. I did a 24 hour urine test, which came back just fine...no excessive amounts of protein in my urine. I was seeing the specialist and my regular OB during the last 4 weeks of the pregnancy. Each visit, each doctor, was a different story...it would go from talking about induction to letting me continue with close monitoring. I felt pulled in ten different directions and I was emotionally tired. I wanted to yell at them to just take the baby out so we could stop all this worrying; was it pre-eclampsia, was it pregnancy induced hypertension, was it dangerous? Nobody could give me any answers but I was too scared to get any either. The panic attacks continued and I was losing sleep over it. I felt as if death was following me around, silently taunting me, ready to take me...I was petrified of this baby and delivery.
The day came and my water broke on it's own. I was 39 weeks and 2 days. Off to the hospital we went. I was admitted and everything went just as it should...baby was born healthy and happy and I was alive. My fears subsided and I told myself I was silly. I came home from the hospital and my mom was there to help me for the week following. I started feeling like I was declining though, instead of getting better. I knew my body was telling me this wasn't right, but I had no idea to even expect it could be my BP...after all, I had delivered the baby. I was no longer pregnant.
One week after the birth of our son, I was driving all five of us and decided to swing into a Sonic for happy hour drinks. We ordered the kids some fries and cherry limeades and that was the last thing I remember. We were stopped, in park, I was buckled into my seatbelt and I had a seizure right there in the car. My husband panicked and called 911, unable to even tell them what was really happening. I wasn't shaking violently, he just looked up and saw me slumped over...he thought I was dead because it looked as if I wasn't breathing. I was rushed to the ER and my doctor was called...my liver was in failure and my BP was through the roof. I don't remember much about what happened other than there was a CT scan done of my brain and nurses rushing around asking each other questions I couldn't understand. What had happened? Why was I here? Why are you talking about eclampsia and HELLP? It's rare to end up with either, but it's even more rare to have it happen after the birth of the baby. The pain I had been feeling in my sternum, the extreme headache that wouldn't go away, all of it pointed to eclampsia and yet nobody ever told me it was even a minute possibility.
My story had a happy ending; after 24 hours on a magnesium sulfate drip I was sent home with blood pressure meds and told to monitor it closely. I was a basket case and wouldn't drive for a couple weeks for fear that something would happen to me again. I could have killed all five of us, or someone else. I was a ball of anxiety and unease and to this day 19 months later I still am. Had my pregnancy continued with two babies I would have died, I know this without a doubt. All three of us would not be here and I wouldn't be able to share my story. Knowing the signs of eclampsia and HELLP and pre-eclampsia IS important, but they aren't always the same for every woman. If you feel off, if you feel like something just isn't right, take those feelings seriously. Don't ignore your inner self telling you to get to the ER immediately...insurance or no insurance your life is worth being saved. I am so thankful to be here for my children and to have had the outcome I did. I was close to dying and I didn't...I am here, hugging and kissing my babies each and every day. I am lucky, I am blessed, I am alive.
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I had never heard of Preeclampsia or eclampsia or HELLP Syndrome,until several months after HELLP nearly killed me. After a relatively easy, medically uneventful pregnancy during which I exercised and ate healthily I came down with the worst class of HELLP Syndrome two days after I ceased the lovenox (a blood thinner) injections I'd put myself on at the advice of two experts. HELLP presented as a severe headache and nausea. My husband called our OB who told him to bring me in right away. Once at the hospital an emergency C-Section was performed. My baby was healthy. However, I was diagnosed with eclampsia and was observed to have seizures on the operating table. The next day my liver ruptured and I was rushed off to a larger hospital for monitoring in the liver ICU in case I needed a transplant. Luckily, my liver healed itself. My brain had been badly damaged, however.
My first memories post stroke/coma are fleeting images of my husband from three months later. My first more extensive, stable memories are SIX MONTHS later. Thus I missed out on the first six months of my much wanted infant daughter's life, unable to live at home with her during that time and unable to remember anything from that time.
Despite this horrible illness I consider myself blessed because I received excellent medical care (costing more than $2 million) that was completely covered by my dual union provided health insurance and, with the help of 18 months of cognitive and physical therapies I have made an excellent (much better than anyone predicted) recovery.
In gratitude, I would like to give back to others. Several months ago my husband and I raised $1,000 for research into infant prematurity for the March of Dimes. Now I would like to help organize another Promise Walk in the LA area to help raise money for research into eclampsia (of which HELLP Syndrome is the most extreme form.)
Contact me if you are interested in participating in or helping to organize such an event. Thanks!
October 25, 2012 - 4:34pmLisa W.
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I deceloped pre-e/hellp five days after delivery. I had no idea this could happen. My only symptom was horrible pain in my right shoulder,which was actually liver pain.
October 25, 2012 - 9:37amThis Comment
I am sorry this happened to you but its nice to see your story because even though it is so rare i ended up with Eclampsia with both of my pregnancies. My 1st son i was induced at 35 weeks and after i gave birth my son stayed in the hospital at the nicu. I was so depressed and started to get sever headaches and thought it was just from the stress of not bringing home my son. I went to sleep the night before in horrible pain and woke up the next morning with the same pain but completely blind! i was alone and didnt know what was going on. I ended up calling my husband and when he arrived to come take me to the hospital i was on the floor having a seizure. It took 39 hours before my vision started to come back. i was in the hospital for a week and then was released with BP meds and had to see a doctor 2 times a week for 6 weeks until it went away. With my 2nd son i kept telling my doctor i was having he same signs as my 1t son and they ignored me, they thought i was some crazy mom that just wanted to complain, until i hit 35 weeks again and my BP went sky high they monitored me and i was finally induced at 38 weeks and we thought i was over it all and was released from the hospital. However 48 hours later i wake my husband because my chest was tight and i was having trouble breathing. He rushed me to the emergency room and when they checked my BP it was 207/109 within minutes i went from bad to worse i was starting to have a heart attack at 22 years old. when they finaly got me stable they took me up to ICU and i had to stay for 4 days. I ended up on 6 different BP medications 4 times a day and had to see a doctor every week and get blood work 2 times a week until it went away and it took til 8 weeks post par tum. They were the scariest days of my life but knowing the signs is what saved my life after my 1st born.
October 25, 2012 - 7:55amThis Comment
Hello Heather,
What a remarkable experience! Thank God you are alive to celebrate each day with your beautiful children. Thank you for sharing your story with other women and alerting them to the importance of listening to their body's signals.
Maryann
October 24, 2012 - 4:44pmThis Comment