My wife and I went to a movie and then lunch. As we were lunching, it occurred to me that we did a smart thing without even knowing it!

The smart thing we did was to have lunch after the movie. Why was this smart? Because if we had planned on lunch before the movie and were running late and the service was slow, or if there was an unanticipated waiting list, we would have been very stressed about being late for the movie.

Of course traffic could slow us down as well, but that would be a possibility no matter how we planned the day (see tips below).

My point here is that sometimes you do have control over your schedule and can take advantage of that to reduce your stress or, maybe a better term in this case would be to avoid some stress.

We are chronically late, so I have devised a system to avoid, or at least reduce, that possibility. I don’t like to be late for things for two reasons: 1) it’s rude and in some cases, can cause major delays in the case of medical appointments and tests, etc. and 2) I have tremendous stress when I know I’m going to be late and I don’t need any more than I already have, thank you very much.

With all of our medical appointments during my wife’s treatments (280+ appointments and still counting) I’ve learned a couple of tricks that will help you avoid being late and suffering the resulting stress:

1.When calculating when you have to leave, remember to add time to find a place to park, and then to travel from the car (usually walking, but not always) to the ultimate destination. Don’t forget about waiting for elevators, slow moving elevators, security, etc.

2. Add some time for unanticipated travel delays.

3. Will you need to stop for gas? That will take a few minutes. (Some of these things are pretty minor, but you will be surprised how they add up!)

4. Add the average amount of travel time assuming no unexpected delays.

5. Add a few minutes to be early: if you have to be there at 10:00, plan on getting there at 9:50.

6. Add a few minutes for delays in getting out of the house.

Example: you have a 10:00 appointment and it takes 30 minutes to get there. Knee-jerk reaction: you have to leave at 9:30. WRONG! Use each of the items above and work backwards. Plan to arrive at 9:50, which means you have to be in the parking lot by 9:40, which means you have to leave the house by 9:10. Now allow a 10 minute delay due to traffic and you have to leave by 9:00. Finally, set your goal to leave by 8:45, allowing for unexpected delays leaving the house.

So, instead of leaving at 9:30 and scrambling to get there on time with lots of stress, plan on leaving at 8:45 and you’ll have a relaxed trip. If everything goes perfectly, which it rarely does, you’ll probably be quite early; would that be so terrible? Bring a book or take a walk and enjoy your serenity!

This article is one in a series on coping strategies for patients and caregivers alike. For more thoughts on caregiving, coping strategies, reducing stress, and just plain fun subscribe to my free monthly newsletter at http://www.CaringAndCoping.com Need a speaker for an upcoming event? I have a program that will knock your socks off! Watch video clips at http://www.ThePPP.org/speaking/#handle