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Life in Old Age: Not the Way We Once Knew It

By HERWriter Guide
 
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Mental Health related image Photo: Getty Images

Who says life begins (or ends) at 40? Old age nowadays is a far cry from the old age of even three decades ago. No longer content to be partner-less or relegated to the old folks home by the age of 75, men and women are finding comfort in remarriage, moving to new homes or even to new countries. Suddenly the twilight of their lives is changing into new beginnings and sunset becomes sunrise, as long as they want it that way.

Spending the holidays with family sees us surrounded by many generations and for me, it’s fantastic to see the old people I know so full of life and energy. While some grandmothers and grandfathers still seem rather fragile (and many really are), so many more these days are working, are engrossed in volunteerism and/or are immersed in hobbies, groups and organizations. They have lives choc-a-bloc with things to do, ambitions to chase and people to talk with. As all of us get older, it’s good to see what the last half of our lives can bring and the exciting changes ahead.

The New Year brings changes (or at least the idea of them) to many of us. For the younger set, it’s engagements, new homes, new lifestyles or jobs. But for seniors, it’s often the same deal nowadays, as people live and work longer and are not content to sit back and watch the world go by. Retirees are getting jobs; some through necessity and others because they want to remain vital and needed in a fast world. Statistically, retirement has often meant death within several years. Somehow, for many of us, our need to contribute to the world is diminished (particularly in the case of men who were conditioned to believe that their work translated into their worth) and death often comes calling once the daily routine of hard work and play is over. There are also many more avenues for older people to explore – working or volunteering either physically or over the Internet. It seems everyone is needed these days, and putting older people out to pasture is not accepted – particularly by the older set themselves. And thank goodness for that. Older Americans are at the forefront of everything from tea party politics to organizing groups, societies, hobby groups and unions. Agree or disagree with their socio-political ideals, seniors are a force to be reckoned with, especially evidenced by the power held by the AARP (American Association of Retired Persons).

It’s also important to remember that all the feminist, racial and social political activists with the ideas of free love and choice were all active in the 1960s. They were mostly 20 and 30-somethings then, meaning these idealists are in their late 60s, 70s and 80s now. This was the generation that changed everything for America in terms of social difference. Instead of thinking of them as invisible seniors, we need to think of them as what they were and are--free thinkers and global social changers. While we sit with our iPods and text all day about everything unimportant in the world (“omg, whaz up, wat u doin?”) this was the generation who made us and our different religion/race partners and marriages possible, and ensured a woman couldn’t get fired from her job for getting married.

Seniors are dating far more now than they ever did (although the unfortunate rise in STDs is also an issue) and there are senior dating sites and group activities where they can meet romantic partners. There are no minor children in the mix, making dating easier. And working seniors have a little money on the side, in order to enjoy some of the trips and activities they sacrificed in order to raise their families.

Now all this is not to say that seniors are somehow tooling around, living the high life, worry-free. Seniors are also facing poverty and foreclosures, although often by this stage of life, their homes are paid off. They have health issues and worries about medications and addiction to pills or alcohol as well as the loneliness that old age can sometimes bring. In other words, seniors have problems like the rest of us.

But spending this Christmas filled with seniors as well as people of other ages (my own generation and my kids included), watching them all doing their thing, traveling long distances and sharing stories about their lives at home during the year, I can truly take heart is knowing all I have to look forward to, both professionally and personally. I am enjoying my younger days now, filled with work challenges and young children and living a busy life. But for someone who has no interest in real retirement or resting on my laurels (ever!), the older generation has shown me how much I have ahead of me and how much I have to look forward to. Long may I get to spend more Christmases with those of a certain age. As they redefined America way back when, they are now redefining old age and living just like they did in their youth – on their own terms.

Tell Us -
Do you see old age differently, as you yourself get older? Are these changes positive or negative - or a mix of both?

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We value and respect our HERWriters' experiences, but everyone is different. Many of our writers are speaking from personal experience, and what's worked for them may not work for you. Their articles are not a substitute for medical advice, although we hope you can gain knowledge from their insight.