The movie Sex and the City brought in the largest opening weekend ever for a romantic comedy, R-rated comedy, and a film starring all women. The TV series (though edited considerably) has become increasingly popular in recent years due to its frank and open discussions about sex from a woman’s point of view.
So, after one movie, six seasons, and 11 years, what have we learned from Sex and the City?
1) Female sexual expression is still confined to upper-class heterosexual white women. The series does feature some fleeting discussions of sex as it pertains to race, sexual orientation, and economic level, but these are related to situations that only last an episode or two (“The Caste System” (Miranda dates a poor man), “What’s Sex Got to Do With It” (Samantha dates a woman), “Boy Girl Boy Girl” (Carrie dates a bisexual man), “No Ifs, Ands, or Butts” (Samantha dates a black man). The only way that Sex and the City attempts to include a long-running discussion of sexual orientation is with its exceedingly flamboyant gay characters, Stanford and Anthony, but their dialogue is cliche at best and stereotypical at worst.
2) Older women are still sexual beings. Once each of the main characters are safely cocooned in a monogamous relationship (which doesn’t occur simultaneously until release of the movie), the writers do a great job of demonstrating that there is sex after marriage…AND sex after 50! In a world where women are shamed for being oblivious to the needs of their male partners and endlessly frigid, it is good to see an accurate and healthy portrayal of middle aged sexuality.
3) Women have a right to be taken seriously by the world. The dialogue can be shallow, consumerist, and flippant at times, but media geared towards males is guilty of the same drawbacks. (And, after all, typically “male” interests, such as sports and hunting, are no more serious than shopping and having lunch with your friends.) Sex and the City removes the typification of many of the markers of femininity, and when it does conform to social standards, it’s straight-forward and open about it – and more important, unapologetic. Not for one second does it try to trivialize the day-to-day lives of women.
4) We long for the fantasy of a strong female friendship more than we long for a relationship. Watching Sex and the City makes women painfully aware of the gap in their own lives inflicted by age, marriage, and family life. It's not a new thing to talk about sex on TV, but the fact that those conversations take place over the backdrop of age-old friendships between the characters is really the key to Sex and the City's success. Good friends are hard to come by in real life, especially once there are more than two women in the equation. Don't we all wish that we had a group of friends like Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda? And don't we all wish our sex lives were as exciting as theirs?
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Shaina Gaul is a feminist and freelance writer living in Iowa. View more of her writing at http://www.couchSpud.net.