Why can't I fall asleep? This is an ongoing issue for many of us and in certain periods of our lives can wreck our quality of life, leaving us exhausted, out of sorts and unable to concentrate at work or with our families. Insomnia is one thing and repeated waking is another, and the sales of medication to improve or reduce or eliminate this problem have sky rocketed.
So what's the problem? It may be sleep apnea, for which there are studies to be done and medical routes to take. Or, it may be something else.
For now, let's focus on the problem of falling asleep naturally as opposed to waking repeatedly which is something you should consult your health provider about.
* Stress: The most common reason for not being able to fall asleep is stress. The worries of the day, a fight with a loved one, an argument or disagreement at work, bills piling up, a messy house, a less-than-desirable relationship, living arrangement, family situation--all of these and millions more can weigh on people so heavily that they literally toss and turn looking for answers, struggling with confusion and depression and simply not falling asleep. Exercise is so beneficial on so many levels. To address the stress in your life, having a good talk with a friend, seeking counseling and journaling can all help. But nothing beats exercise for just getting your head out of the issues bogging it down, getting the "feel good" chemicals, those endorphins flowing, and getting the blood and oxygen pumping through your system, making your skin glow, your muscles activate and your thoughts give way to your body. Naturally, you are also more physically tired later and your body may simply take over, shutting down and surrendering without your having to constantly cajole it into a state of relaxation. Even walking can induce this relaxation, working your muscles while tiring you out and calming you down.
* Eating too close to bedtime - this is something our grandmothers told us would give us nightmares and it's not only true, it's more than that -- it can keep you up for hours. After eating, the body needs time to digest and this process takes energy. Of course certain foods will make you drowsy but giving yourself an hour or two after eating and before laying down is generally wise.
So what helps?
* Drink chamomile tea before bed. The warm liquid and the herb itself promotes relaxation and can induce sleep.
* Read something good. Even if it's really engaging, the act of reading can make you sleep and comfort you. Sometimes it's really the comfort of reading, and the stress reduction which finally allow you to fall asleep.
* Get off sugar and coffee for as long as you can - a daily intake of refined sugar and caffeine can really throw your system out of balance. If you are overworked, stressed out and drinking lots of coffee and eating lots of sugar, chances are you may in a vicious cycle of not sleeping enough and drinking more coffee and eating more sugar to keep yourself awake during the day. The health effects of this type of lifestyle can be far-reaching, but in the short term, it may be that what you're doing during the day to help yourself stay awake is actually contributing to your not sleeping at night.
* Take a hot bath or shower. The warmth of the water and the steam created in the bathroom can be just what you need to relax your muscles and put you in a sleepy mood
* Listen to soft jazz or classical music. This is a nice way to relax and even fall asleep. Place the iPod or stereo near enough to you that you can hear the music but not so loud that it's interfering with your thoughts. The dulcet tones of Brahms or Coltrane may soothe your troubled heart and cascade over you, washing your worries away and allowing you to slip into a soft, comfortable pillowed Neverland.
* Meditation - just the act of focusing on your breathing. In, out, in, out, in, out, can calm you down, slow your heart rate, and put you at ease. This is restful and nurturing and, even if you don't fall asleep, it can be refreshing and rejuvenating for your mind, body and spirit.
Aimee Boyle writes regularly for EmpowerHER about health, sexuality and relationships.