Separation and divorce is a growing epidemic in the Western world.
The Statistics
Although the American government is no longer collecting and measuring divorce statistics, it is generally accepted that nearly half of all marriages end in divorce.
Since Canada introduced the “no-fault divorce” 30 years ago, the number of marital break ups has increased over 600 percent.
But all around the world marriages are breaking down and families are splitting up.
A New Direction
Given the above statistics, it is reasonable to assume that a good percentage of the women reading this article have experienced a marital break up or are going through that right now. It is EmpowHER.com’s goal to be a resource for all women and to reach women where they’re at. This means getting a little personal. Getting beyond disease descriptions and symptoms, and connecting at a heart level.
Women find comfort in sharing their experiences with people who have already been where they are. Women find comfort in giving comfort to those who may not have experienced these things before. Women can connect with women in a way that men simply cannot. That’s what the new Marital Discovery and Recovery chat group will offer for EmpowHER.com women--a forum to find support and encouragement and to offer support and encouragement to one another.
Once a week a new article will be published regarding those of us who have experienced or are experiencing a marital break up. The assumed permanency of marriage brings with it a whole different set of questions and issues when the marriage breaks down--different than shorter-term dating relationships, and deeper than sexual issues. While generic comments will always be welcome on the main site, those of you who wish to share your more personal comments and stories can do so on the new group. It is hoped also that through sharing more topics will be raised for articles which can help other women deal with things where they are. This includes longer-term common law relationships.
This group isn’t there to judge whether or not your divorce/separation was justified, only to help you recover, rediscover and carry on. Not only will we deal with divorce and separation, but also discovering the warning signs in your relationship that could indicate that your marriage could be on its way out, and what kinds of things could be the turning point for saving your marriage.
My story
After 14 years of a loveless marriage and a couple of occasions where my husband admitted that he didn’t love me and wasn’t sure that he had ever loved me, he told me that he didn’t want to stay married. I had already come to the conclusion some time before that our marriage was over, but had struggled to keep it going, until finally I had to admit that I really didn’t want to be married to him anymore. But because of my commitment to my wedding vows, I would have carried on if my husband wanted to keep things going. Admittedly, I was extremely relieved when he said "no".
We had two beautiful children--the youngest his last attempt to try to discover any love he might have had for me. We had been friends before and still remain friends. Thankfully, our relationship ended on good terms, which is also a huge bonus for our children.
Now I’m looking forward to the next chapter in my life; a chapter that I’m determined to be very different from the past 14 years. In the year and a bit since our “official” separation I have learned a lot about myself, have learned to deal with rebounding and where I need to be in my own heart before I can get involved with someone else, and just adjusting to life as a single in general.
So the first questions for the Marital Discovery and Recovery group is: what is your story?