As Mother’s Day comes around the bend, many of us harken back to the days of flowers and candy on Mother’s Day, festivities which resemble a sort of Valentine’s Day of the Mother.
Going out to brunch or dinner with one’s mother, buying her roses or chocolates or both, giving her a card, a hug and a kiss, and thanking her for all she’s done, been and will be for you -- these are the symbols and springtime rituals we have grown up with.
Whether we realize it or not, Mother’s Day was actually an English and Irish tradition called “Mothering Day,” during which families could break their fast from Lent and celebrate with a large meal, honoring mother as the guest of honor.
Julia Ward Howe, the woman who wrote “The Battle Hymn of the Republic” proclaimed Mother’s Day in 1870.
Originally this proclamation was made in direct response to the horrors of the Civil War. Howe felt that it was up to the mothers of the United States to call for peace and carry the weight of humanitarian values on their shoulders.
For more about her incredible bravery and her stand for mothers and peace, follow this link:
http://www.mothersdaycentral.com/about-mothersday/history/
Actually, the tradition of honoring mothers dates back well before Howe or the Irish or English traditions. Isis was the first female deity to be worshiped and echoes of her reign have resounded throughout the ages.
So the question beckons, with all of this technology we now have available at the flick of our fingertips, do we celebrate Mother’s Day for real or not? Do we send an e-card, for example, or a real one?
If we’re not able to be with our mothers due to distance, travel, finances or hundreds of other reasons, do we Skype, text or call on the telephone?
The other day I saw an ad for an app that actually allows you to send a “bouquet” of flowers to your mother from your iPhone. This, of course, is a virtual bouquet. And I ask, “Is that okay?”
As we weave our way endlessly into the future, there are going to be more and more opportunities to make a representational attempt at being with someone or giving them something without actual physical contact or presence.
Is this type of celebration real or not? The expression “phoning it in” used to be an insult -- referring to someone who was only doing a “halfway” job -- who wasn’t really invested in his or her work or relationship.
Nowadays it’s almost as if it’s quaint or arcane to not “phone it in” or to not even have any phone with any type of app at all.
Is it real to phone it in? Or not? That is the question.
Aimee Boyle is a regular contributor to EmpowHER. She is also a special education teacher and mother.