From potential employees to potential lovers, nearly everyone lies about something. And while little white lies are normal and can even help maintain social order, big lies can quickly cause huge problems and even place you in danger.
Although there’s no surefire trick for determining if someone is lying, there are plenty of behavioral cues liars give if you watch closely enough. Here are the most common signs of a lie:
New Behavior
It is much easier to tell that someone is lying if you know them well. This allows you to weigh everything going on in that person’s life against any strange or new behavior. Whenever someone acts dramatically differently from normal, it’s a glaring red flag that they might be lying.
But don’t jump the gun too quickly. Many people get so nervous talking about stressful topics that they act strangely, so the weird behavior might be the product of nerves rather than lying.
Too Little or Too Much Detail
When people lie, they tend to either give way too much detail because they’re trying to convince you that their story is legitimate or way too little detail because they don’t want to face follow-up questions.
This is another area where knowing someone’s normal behavior can be helpful. Talkative people who suddenly become reserved and quiet people who begin talking incessantly both might be lying.
Changing the Subject
People change the subject for a variety of reasons, including boredom and anxiety, but a sudden change of subject along with several other signs of lying is a big red flag.
Body Language
Several body language cues may indicate that someone is lying. Frequent nose-scratching, averting of the eyes, or rustling of papers are all telltale signs. Any body language that is designed to divert attention from the face, such as pacing or stretching may also indicate a lie.
However, the most important factor in assessing body language is to know a person’s normal body language. Some people are naturally twitchy, and for these people, still and stoic behavior might indicate a lie. Watch for any departure from the person’s normal way of moving. The more keenly you observe people, the better equipped you will be to predict their lies.
Defensive Reactions
There’s a popular children’s book in which the main character’s hat is stolen. He walks around asking friends if they took his hat, and they all respond no, except for the actual thief, who responds with, “Why would I do that? I don’t even like hats!” And this book offers a valuable lesson because defensive behavior often indicates lies.
People who are telling the truth are more likely to go on the offensive. So, for example, an employee who isn’t actually stealing money might say something like, “I would never steal money and I’m tired of not getting credit for anything,” while an employee who did actually steal would be more likely to list the reasons he didn’t and try to make a strong case to convince you he’s not a thief.
This is a fine line and it can be difficult to tell the difference between the two reactions, but if you find yourself falling victim to accusations from the other person, he may actually be telling the truth.
Verbal Behavior
Someone who is lying might repeat the last few words of your question. For example, “No, I did not take the money,” rather than, “No,” or “Of course not.” This provides them with verbal filler that serves as a distraction for the person interrogating them.
Similarly, people who are lying are less likely to use contractions such as “don’t” and “didn’t”. People who rarely lie and are uncomfortable lying (but nevertheless doing it) frequently avoid “technically” lying by only answering questions indirectly.
For example, an employee who is lying about how late he was might say, “I have always been responsible and good to this company,” rather than, “I wasn’t late.”
Sources:
McClish, M. (2001). I know you are lying: Detecting deception through statement analysis. Winterville, NC: PoliceEmployment.com.
Walters, S. B. (2000). The truth about lying: How to spot a lie and protect yourself from deception. Naperville, IL: Sourcebooks.
Edited by Jody Smith