For many women, having children is a major goal in life. So it’s understandable that the inability to have children can be difficult for some women to cope with.
National Infertility Awareness Week, which runs from April 22 to 28, is all about increasing awareness of infertility and issues related to infertility.
Mental health issues can be linked to infertility, and experts share their information on this important connection.
According to RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association website’s article by Alice Domar, “stress does not cause infertility,” but “infertility most definitely causes stress.” Women who are infertile are also more likely to suffer from depression due to their issues with conceiving.
Another part of the website does suggest that “emotional factors” are risk factors. The article states that “depression and stress may have a direct effect on the hormones that regulate reproduction and affect sperm production or ovulation.”
The Association’s website also explains that there can be many different feelings of loss associated with infertility, which is perfectly normal. A decrease in self-esteem can be a result of infertility, but it doesn’t have to be a new way of life.
The Association does have resources to help couples who are struggling with infertility. There are also different options that couples can try to possibly overcome infertility.
Other emotions associated with infertility for those who are trying to conceive are denial, shock, numbness, anger, guilt and shame, according to the Association’s website. The website also suggests that couples might suffer from feelings of grief, like “lack of energy,” “headaches,” irritability,” “insomnia,” “extreme sadness” and “inability to concentrate.”
Judith Horowitz, a licensed psychologist, said in an email that she thinks infertility does have a negative impact on mental health.
“Some of the emotional sequelae of infertility include being thrust into a crisis, stigma, higher rates of depression, shame, grief, sadness, isolation, anxiety, feelings of anger, loss, avoidant coping styles, consumed with thoughts about how to get pregnant, problems with family and friends, etc,” Horowitz said.
Couples who might have been able to accomplish other goals in life might not know how to handle this obstacle.
“This may be the first time an individual has not been able to achieve whatever he or she set out to accomplish,” Horowitz said.
“Additionally, it is a hidden disease, and the infertile often feel ashamed to discuss their problem, as if it were a personal failing. Life seems unfair, especially when they read about how easily others who don't want children can conceive and how poorly some children are treated.”
Other mental health issues associated with infertility can include “marital stress, general stress which can lead to heart disease and cancer, prolonged grief, financial woes, sleep disruption, anxiety, depression, agoraphobia (don't want to run into young children or pregnant women), etc.,” Horowitz said.
Infertility may not always be associated with negative mental health. For example, couples who don’t want children are not really affected by infertility, and even couples who do want children may have other positive outcomes as a result of infertility.
“After achieving parenthood, infertility may lead to a positive outcome because people may become more resilient,” Horowitz said. “Moreover, for couples experiencing infertility, they may become closer because they have acted as a team, working together for the same goal with increased communication.”
People can cope with infertility by doing activities that in general are associated with positive mental health, such as exercise, relaxation techniques, psychotherapy, volunteering, meditation, buying a pet, improving diet, spending time with good friends, watching humorous movies and getting a decent amount of sleep, she said.
Infertility can affect men and women differently in some cases.
“Women are more obsessive and want to talk about infertility more frequently than men,” Horowitz said.
“Men, who are socialized to ‘fix’ problems, have a more solution-based approach. Women are upset when their male partner isn't available for them to vent. Men are upset that they can't fix the problem, and are more likely to withdraw as a coping mechanism. Their sex life can suffer because it can become mechanical and/or non-existent. Men feel they have to perform on demand. Women believe that sex should only be for procreation, especially after failed fertility treatments.”
Awareness can be key to how people react to and deal with infertility, as well as how people support others who are suffering from infertility.
“The general public will hopefully learn not to ask individuals or couples ‘when they intend to start their family,’” Horowitz said.
“If a couple has been together for a while, and previously expressed a desire to have children, family and friends will do well to back off and not ask them questions about having children and expanding their family. Comments such as ‘just relax and it will happen,’ ‘have a glass of wine,’ or ‘as soon as my friend adopted, she conceived her own child’ are not only hurtful, but do not help and are not true.”
Sources:
RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. National Infertility Awareness Week – April 22 to 28. Web. March 21, 2012.
http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/home-page.html
Domar, Alice. RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. Relaxation and Stress Management for Infertile Women. Web. March 22, 2012. http://www.resolve.org/infertility-overview/optimizing-fertility/relaxation-and-stress-management-for-infertile-women.html
RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. Risk Factors. Web. March 22, 2012. http://www.resolve.org/infertility-overview/optimizing-fertility/risk-factors.html
RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. Hidden No More: The Hidden Emotions of Infertility. Web. March 22, 2012.
http://www.resolve.org/infertility-overview/what-is-infertility/hidden-no-more-the-hidden-emotions-of-infertility.html
RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. Emotional Aspects of Infertility. Web. March 22, 2012.
http://www.resolve.org/support-and-services/Managing-Infertility-Stress/emotional-aspects.html
Horowitz, Judith. Email interview. March 20, 2012.
Reviewed March 22, 2012
by Michele Blacksberg RN
Edited by Jody Smith