Hello,
I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I have been going to therapy for about 3 years (mostly cognitive behavioral therapy) and I have been on an anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medication for 4 months. I'm finding some relief with the antidepressant but I haven't had much success with the anti-anxiety medication. My doctor and I have spoken about this so he has prescribed me a new one to try. The point is: I'm really trying to get better and FEEL better. My main problem is I suffer with negative, intrusive thoughts. They always have something to do with my boyfriend of two years. I can't stop thinking about his past; his ex-girlfriends, his sexual history, his actions. I think of "what if" scenerios and how I think he would act in them. I try to remember past conversations and analyze what he said. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night to use the washroom and even before I am able to get my feet out of the bed, an intrusive thought will come to mind. I hate how these thoughts make me feel and act. I've even suggested breaking up with my boyfriend just so we can both get some relief.
For the record, my boyfriend is a great guy. Deep down, I know my issues and concerns have nothing to do with him. They stem from a horrible, traumatizing experience I had with a previous partner. I'm truly trying to work through it. I just need some advice or suggestions as to how to deal with these intrusive thoughts so they don't plague me as much or as often.
Thank you so much!