Monday, April 14, 2008
Conflict Resolution
Thank you to all that commented about Sam. Before I tell you the outcome I want you all to know that Sam is a good kid, but by no means is the boy a Saint. Sam often gets detention (for fooling around in class,) can be extremely mouthy and back-talkish with M and me, often picks fights with his siblings and at least once a day does something dumb (like forgets to pack his shorts for lacrosse practice and ends up playing in his boxers.)
That said, he does have a heart of gold and when push came to shove last Friday, Sam shoved. A few of his buddies backed out of the confrontation, but Sam and the remaining troops went up to the bullies and firmly suggested that they should leave their friend alone. There was some teenage swearing, a little tussle between two of the boys (no one was hurt) and a few threats made. All in all, I think that Sam’s friend will have an easier time of it, but as I told him earlier, his job is not to protect his friend all the time. Both boys need to live their own lives and offer support when needed, plain and simple.
I think it is also fair to point out that Sam did not come by this “help out the gay guy” mentality all on his own. Sam’s father, M’s life long best friend is gay. My children have always known that Uncle best friend is gay and there is absolutely no drama around M and best friend’s friendship. My children love their uncle and he is a very present part of our family. So, I think it is fair to say that Sam had the advantage of living the truth, which then led him to, more easily than most kids, call out the injustice. To Sam, that could have been his beloved uncle best friend being bullied.
Do you guys get that?
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