Last week, Oprah Winfrey talked about "falling off the wagon" with her weight, and regaining 40 pounds in the last year or two. I was particularly interested because I, too, put on quite a bit of weight in the last two years and am now working to return to my former healthy self.
One of the things she said that totally touched a nerve with me was that she had fallen off her own priority list. In between her talk show, her school for girls in Africa, her radio program and her magazine, she had let time for herself slip through the cracks. Whether it was time to fix a healthy meal or just time to relax for a pedicure, she'd let it all dissolve into a bunch of 14-hour days and 7-day weeks. She's been aching for balance, and eating when she couldn't find it.
I think we women, as a group, seem just plain horrible at keeping ourselves on our own priority lists. Maybe we don't have a talk show or a magazine, but we have jobs, and children, and many things tugging at us for attention. We seem to find it very easy to put ourselves at the bottom of the list, planning to get to our diet, our workout, our journal time "when we can." And then that "when we can" gets more and more elusive.
My evil twin wants to sit on my shoulder and say "If Oprah can't do it, with all the cooks and personal trainers and assistants in the world, then who are you to think you can?" But my good twin on the other shoulder says, "Clearly, it's not the personal chefs and the trainers that make the difference. It's the attitude, and I can certainly do that."
I loved it when I was fit. I loved it when I could easily shimmy into my favorite pair of jeans, and slide my hands into the pockets. I loved it when I felt vital and healthy. And I want to feel that way again.
Why are we so at home at the bottom of our own priority lists? Why do our needs sit down there even beneath "run to the post office" and "make vet appointment" ? What does it take to get this fixed, once and for all?