I found myself pregnant with my third child and emotionally vested in a mothering role with a stray cat. When it became clear that our current indoor cat was rejecting the acceptance of another cat coming into the house, I faced a new problem.
With the help of a friend, a miracle happened; I was introduced to a young couple that said they would be interested in seeing the cat. That afternoon before the meeting, I held Bella. I stroked the soft fur under her chin and talked to her in a soft voice as she purred and stared at me with mystic green eyes. I hoped that she would understand my words. I did want her to stay but she wouldn’t be able to live in our house. She was such an affectionate and beautiful little cat. She deserved soft couches to lounge on, furniture to climb, and an owner that would let her snuggle up in bed. I whispered the promise that I would I find her a safe and happy home.
The young couple was perfect. As I had hoped, they loved her at first sight. When the three of us entered the garage and Bella ran past them and straight to my feet, my heart began to break. They bent to pet her and she was friendly and receptive. They were gentle and kind with her. I quietly returned to the house to give them a few minutes alone. It did not take long for the couple to walk into my living room with the happy news that they would love to take Bella home and were even keeping her name. With those words said, I felt a great relief and then almost instantaneously, heartbreak. I managed to smile and left the room to gather Bella’s belongings.
As I collected the paperwork from the vet, small cat toys that the boys had picked out for her, and the tiny pink collar with a silver tag that was engraved with her name, a lump began to form in my throat and an ache started to build up in my chest. Without warning, tears began to stream down my face and within minutes, I was sobbing. My husband came to check on me and witnessed the breakdown.
“You want to give the cat away, right?” He asked me sympathetically. I struggled to nod and blurt out, “Of course, I know that we can’t keep her. It is for the best.”
I could not stop crying until long after they drove Bella away. I am sure that it was hard for my husband to understand and something that I couldn’t explain. I was grateful that the couple stayed in contact with occasional e-mails and pictures of Bella comfortable and happy in her new home. I believe that pregnancy hormones were strong during that experience, but it was the maternal instinct that taught me that it doesn’t take long to realize that you love something.