It sounds so silly. I'm not particularly overweight. I don't like shopping for clothes it makes me really nervy, because I don't find many clothes which I feel comfortable in,I start trying things on but then I always see a fat ugly wrong cow in the mirror, I look like a boxer or middle aged bloke and then right there in the changing room my tummy starts to pertrude until I look about 7 months pregnant. I don't really like things which fit snuggly, it makes me feel sort of exposed, agitated, then i want to tear them off because to me I look and feel supernaturally big in anything fitted and creep back into what my sister calls low self esteem clothes, i'd say baggy, comfortable.Yes they probably are low self esteem clothes, though I like the refuge of them. Its weird because a lot of people say very nice things about me, I have a wonderful relationship with my partner, I don't feel inhibited with him. also when I get up and get ready in the morning to go to work, i don't get this bloated thing. only I do often when I'm getting ready to go to a party or friends. Like I'm absolutely terrified of my friends!! it doesn't feel mentally like I am, only my body just gets out of control and my mind starts beating myself up about how dreadful I look and then bloat-a-rama, I'm massive. i just wish I could get over this, its stupid and gets in the way of life, Iike I have an awful secret that Im not normal