Thanksgiving is the day many people associate with thankfulness, but this state of mind or feeling can travel with us daily and impact our mental health in a positive way. Experts and everyday people have insight into what thankfulness is and how it’s linked to positive mental health.
Xin Gu, a “performance coach specializing in helping people getting through the neuroses that stand in the way of getting to what they want,” defined in an email what thankfulness means to her.
“Thankfulness is a state of gratitude,” Gu said. “That means to look upon everything we have had as a blessing.”
She has a certain exercise that works well in helping people be more thankful. Here are the steps:
1) “To get the process started, think of something good that has happened to you in the recent past and noting just what a blessing that was.”
2) “As you process that thought in your head, you will note that your emotional state is changing. You are likely to be in what we ... would call 'a good place.’”
“This is a very helpful exercise because it allows us to focus on something positive,” Gu said. “It's like receiving a really great gift - it just makes you feel good. You do that often enough, it becomes a habit.”
However, the real challenge can be to think of bad past situations as experiences to be thankful for.
“Ask yourself, ‘How can I look upon that as a blessing?’’’ Gu said. “It might be hard to do. And you don't have to push it. But if you attempt that over time, it will start to work, and that's when the real breakthrough comes in. That is when you begin to develop the mentality that no matter what happens to you, it is something to be thankful about.”
Willie Joley, a motivational speaker and author of “A Setback is A Setup for a Comeback,” has a similar definition of thankfulness.
“Thankfulness is being blessed by all the wonderful things around you,” Joley said. “It’s your family, your health, your success and waking up every day with the opportunity to do great things.”
Being thankful is linked to being positive.
“Being thankful improves mental health because it makes you more positive,” Joley said. “When you are thankful for the things in your life, you are living with an attitude of gratitude. You may not be able to choose what happens to you, but you can control what happens in you. Choose to be positive and thankful for everything in your life. Develop an 'It’s All Good’ attitude.”
Thankfulness can trickle into other areas of your life as well.
“Despite the little things that would get most people down, you remain calm, continue to work hard and enjoy life,” Joley said. “Being thankful puts you in a much better emotional state and people enjoy being around you.”
You can be more thankful by doing simple actions like:
1) “Trying to be a better listener”
2) “Saying thank you when someone does something nice for you”
3) “Take a few seconds to compliment someone and tell them how thankful you are for them”
“Thankfulness is contagious, so it will usually rub off on the other people around you,” Jolley said.
Hazel Palache, a mindset expert and author of “The Astonishing Power of You,” suggested in an email that she sees the link between thankfulness and improved mental health as well.
“[Thankfulness is] gratitude for what we have instead of focusing on what we don’t have,” Palache said. “People who are not thankful and don’t feel grateful will often have very negative mindsets that create depression, overwhelm, procrastination and a host of other negative thoughts.”
She personally has felt the effects of thankfulness, and knows that others can too with a little effort.
“Being grateful to me means I feel more joyful and happy about my life never mind what’s going on,” Palache said. “Being grateful is often something that is learned rather than natural. It’s really about looking at the positives in life instead of looking at the negatives.”
Women especially can be stuck in a rut of focusing on more negative thoughts than positive ones.
“Women can get stuck in negative thinking until they learn to think differently,” Palache said. “Once they understand how positive thinking and gratitude can change their lives, they are usually pretty quick to change things.”
Rachel Starck, a licensed professional counselor and life coach, suggested in an email that the effort to be more thankful can have many rewards for mental health.
“Focusing on what we do have, practicing thankfulness every day contributes to a 'glass half full' outlook,” Starck said. “Research shows that those who have a positive outlook, glass half full attitude, experience many health benefits, including increased resiliency, improved immune response, and decreased rates of depression.”
She feels like a better person when she is more thankful.
“Holding a thankful attitude helps me to focus on the positive, to move away from deficit thinking (pining for what I do not have),” Starck said. “When I am focused on what I am thankful for, it puts me in a warm, giving, happy space. A space from which I have energy and motivation to give back (to community, family, friends, causes).”
You can start the process today of being more thankful by putting your mind to it.
“When you start setting the intention to focus on thankfulness, gratitude and appreciations, it will become more natural,” Starck said. “It takes a good 21 days to set a new habit, but we can create the habit of thankfulness. A practical way to do this is to start each day with a two minute [meditation] on what you are thankful for that day, what are you grateful for, who do you appreciate, why do you appreciate them, what blessings are in your life and how will you express this through out the day.”
Sources:
Gu, Xin. Email interview. Nov. 22, 2011
Jolley, Willie. Email interview. Nov. 22, 2011
Palache, Hazel. Email interview. Nov. 22, 2011
Starck, Rachel. Email interview. Nov. 22, 2011
Reviewed November 24, 2011
by Michele Blacksberg RN
Edited by Jody Smith