My biggest problem is verbal and mental abuse my my husband. At family gatherings, my in-laws think he is a saint. His friends and co-workers think he is a saint. The truth is is that he plays manipulative mind games with me. At first I wasn't sure what was going on. I thought maybe everything was my fault, the lack of trust in me, his paranoia, etc. But now, I realize it's him and his problem. I've gotten stronger by writing letters...to myself. Whenever I need to vent an tell him what I think, I write a letter and pour it all out. The problem is, I don't have the courage to give or tell him these thoughts, so I put them in a letter and send it to myself. I fill better once written, and I fill even better about venting my feelings by sending it out in the world. Granted, it comes back to me, but I know my feelings are worthy enough to be validated.