Thanks for this post. I've heard that before two people marry, or decide to commit to each other in a lifelong partnership, that they should be compatible (or be able to compromise) on issues of finances, raising children, ideal locations to live...and other lifestyle choices.
Now that I have a toddler, I realize that I would never have been able to have a meaningful discussion with my then-boyfriend/fiance about how to raise a child--whether it be a discussion of discipline, working vs. staying at home, etc. Not until we had our son, was I able to have an opinion on best methods to raise my son, as every child is so different! Never in a million years would I have thought I'd give up a career I worked so hard for...in order to stay home with my son for a few years!
My question, then, is: how do couples have a meaningful, worthwhile conversation about "how to raise a child" before they get married/commit, when they really don't know what they're in for? So many variables to discuss, I can not imagine how to make this a productive discussion, although it sounds like a reasonable thing to do. Do you have a "top 10" list of scenarios or questions that couples should discuss with one another?
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Thanks for this post. I've heard that before two people marry, or decide to commit to each other in a lifelong partnership, that they should be compatible (or be able to compromise) on issues of finances, raising children, ideal locations to live...and other lifestyle choices.
Now that I have a toddler, I realize that I would never have been able to have a meaningful discussion with my then-boyfriend/fiance about how to raise a child--whether it be a discussion of discipline, working vs. staying at home, etc. Not until we had our son, was I able to have an opinion on best methods to raise my son, as every child is so different! Never in a million years would I have thought I'd give up a career I worked so hard for...in order to stay home with my son for a few years!
My question, then, is: how do couples have a meaningful, worthwhile conversation about "how to raise a child" before they get married/commit, when they really don't know what they're in for? So many variables to discuss, I can not imagine how to make this a productive discussion, although it sounds like a reasonable thing to do. Do you have a "top 10" list of scenarios or questions that couples should discuss with one another?
July 20, 2008 - 11:09amThis Comment
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