One of the toughest things about being part of the sandwich generation can be caring for multiple parents over time. One of my best friends and her husband cared for her father after a stroke, both of his parents as they aged and became frail, and later her mom as she had kidney problems. During this time they raised their son and each had full-time jobs.
There were many, many times when the competing pressures of a young, active child and older parents made my friend pull her hair out. Like you say, there were physical issues, transportation issues, and challenges on the home front. And perhaps the toughest thing of all was the constant flood of emotions you feel when you see your parent having difficulty with aging issues.
Their son is 16 now. I have met many teenagers, but he is more comfortable and articulate with me and other adults than most I have met. And he is not afraid to give a hug when most kids would roll their eyes and feign embarrassment. I have to think that somewhere in all those years of multi-generational care giving, the mix between old, middle-age and young benefitted him more than any of us will ever know.
I admire those who are sandwiched between parents and children. If you are a caregiver, be sure to find a way to take some time for yourself every once in a while. You matter. You matter to your children, you matter to your significant other, and you matter to your parents. The best thing you can do for the people who depend on you is keep yourself well.
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One of the toughest things about being part of the sandwich generation can be caring for multiple parents over time. One of my best friends and her husband cared for her father after a stroke, both of his parents as they aged and became frail, and later her mom as she had kidney problems. During this time they raised their son and each had full-time jobs.
There were many, many times when the competing pressures of a young, active child and older parents made my friend pull her hair out. Like you say, there were physical issues, transportation issues, and challenges on the home front. And perhaps the toughest thing of all was the constant flood of emotions you feel when you see your parent having difficulty with aging issues.
Their son is 16 now. I have met many teenagers, but he is more comfortable and articulate with me and other adults than most I have met. And he is not afraid to give a hug when most kids would roll their eyes and feign embarrassment. I have to think that somewhere in all those years of multi-generational care giving, the mix between old, middle-age and young benefitted him more than any of us will ever know.
I admire those who are sandwiched between parents and children. If you are a caregiver, be sure to find a way to take some time for yourself every once in a while. You matter. You matter to your children, you matter to your significant other, and you matter to your parents. The best thing you can do for the people who depend on you is keep yourself well.
October 7, 2008 - 9:03amThis Comment
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