Dear persons with sick spouses,
I can feel for all of you. My wife has been ill for more than 5 years. The diagnosis of Lupus was difficult to make, and took at least 2 years of doctor visits and tests. In part, because of her illness, I lost my job, and had to find another job in another city. I commute back to see her on the weekends. Fortunately, she is considerably better than when she was first ill. She seems comfortable in the family home, yet after some years of commuting, I know that the life that I now live is not an ideal one. Much physical intimacy has been lost. When we talk about our relationship, it is clear that she is filled with ill feelings toward me and others. This is in large part due to years of frustration and ill health. Also due to some age-old issues that are magnified by her illness. There are few answers, and little of a middle ground. As a spouse of a sick wife, you are either all in or all out. I'm still all in. Can I continue to commute for many more years? I've been unsuccessful in finding a job in our "home city". Things are better than they used to me, in large part because see is improved from years earlier.
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Dear persons with sick spouses,
January 23, 2014 - 10:25amI can feel for all of you. My wife has been ill for more than 5 years. The diagnosis of Lupus was difficult to make, and took at least 2 years of doctor visits and tests. In part, because of her illness, I lost my job, and had to find another job in another city. I commute back to see her on the weekends. Fortunately, she is considerably better than when she was first ill. She seems comfortable in the family home, yet after some years of commuting, I know that the life that I now live is not an ideal one. Much physical intimacy has been lost. When we talk about our relationship, it is clear that she is filled with ill feelings toward me and others. This is in large part due to years of frustration and ill health. Also due to some age-old issues that are magnified by her illness. There are few answers, and little of a middle ground. As a spouse of a sick wife, you are either all in or all out. I'm still all in. Can I continue to commute for many more years? I've been unsuccessful in finding a job in our "home city". Things are better than they used to me, in large part because see is improved from years earlier.
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