I found this article through a search on Google. While our situation isn't exactly similar, it's close in some ways.
My wife has MSIDS or better known as Lyme Disease. She was diagnosed a year and a half ago. We've been together since January 2011, married in May 2012. I'm a 27 year old female, and completely confused. I knew her before all of the health issues started. I knew her when she was vibrant, active, sweet, caring, loving, understanding, and passionate about many things. She has changed so much since that time. She is now bitter, filled with rage, depression and resentment. She mostly resents me because I don't want to have sex. I have a very low sex drive, and it's been an issue in our relationship since about 6 months after we started dating (due mostly to unresolved sexual abuse issues). I admit that I haven't given my own stuff as much attention as I should since I've focused pretty much all of my time, energy and money into getting her better.
We've had frequent fights as of late, mostly me starting off with why she's so cold, distant, aloof. Always on her phone. Never engaging me. She tells me she resents me for lack of sex. She's also said so many hurtful things over these past many months. I know Lyme has changed her. I also feel like she'll never be the same, even when she gets better.
On top of all of this, I'm finding myself dreaming about men and wondering what it would be like to be with one after all these years.
There's obviously a lot going on in my world and I'm doing a lot of soul searching and list writing so I don't make any rash decisions. I'd suggest writing lists, ones relevant to your relationship and ones that aren't. Examples: pros/cons of leaving, what makes you happy/unhappy (in general, not in the relationship), all the good times with your spouse/all the bad times with your spouse (being specific to actual events).
I don't have any answers for you or for myself. I hope we both can tune into our highest selves to make the right decision for us. Remember, don't base your decision on anyone but yourself. Don't worry about what other people think. Ultimately, you're the only person you have that will be there through everything. Fall in love with yourself. Sounds like you need some time to be selfis- whether you choose to stay or to leave.
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I found this article through a search on Google. While our situation isn't exactly similar, it's close in some ways.
My wife has MSIDS or better known as Lyme Disease. She was diagnosed a year and a half ago. We've been together since January 2011, married in May 2012. I'm a 27 year old female, and completely confused. I knew her before all of the health issues started. I knew her when she was vibrant, active, sweet, caring, loving, understanding, and passionate about many things. She has changed so much since that time. She is now bitter, filled with rage, depression and resentment. She mostly resents me because I don't want to have sex. I have a very low sex drive, and it's been an issue in our relationship since about 6 months after we started dating (due mostly to unresolved sexual abuse issues). I admit that I haven't given my own stuff as much attention as I should since I've focused pretty much all of my time, energy and money into getting her better.
We've had frequent fights as of late, mostly me starting off with why she's so cold, distant, aloof. Always on her phone. Never engaging me. She tells me she resents me for lack of sex. She's also said so many hurtful things over these past many months. I know Lyme has changed her. I also feel like she'll never be the same, even when she gets better.
On top of all of this, I'm finding myself dreaming about men and wondering what it would be like to be with one after all these years.
There's obviously a lot going on in my world and I'm doing a lot of soul searching and list writing so I don't make any rash decisions. I'd suggest writing lists, ones relevant to your relationship and ones that aren't. Examples: pros/cons of leaving, what makes you happy/unhappy (in general, not in the relationship), all the good times with your spouse/all the bad times with your spouse (being specific to actual events).
I don't have any answers for you or for myself. I hope we both can tune into our highest selves to make the right decision for us. Remember, don't base your decision on anyone but yourself. Don't worry about what other people think. Ultimately, you're the only person you have that will be there through everything. Fall in love with yourself. Sounds like you need some time to be selfis- whether you choose to stay or to leave.
March 10, 2015 - 11:58pmThis Comment
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