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Anon - Have you sought any help for yourself? It sounds like you are extremely frustrated and angry about this situation. There really is nothing we can do to change other people's behavior, the only one we can directly impact is our self. If your step daughter is old enough to drink legally then she is responsible for her own behavior, just as you are responsible for yours. Instead of making yourself sick trying to change her, have you tried finding ways to not let this get to you? Pat