Every body is different, but I know this... If I would have spoken to someone as myself, who have and realize the same symptoms I have; I would not have taken the chance to have this done. Toodles, you are so lucky. Even with the research you said you did, it could all be done, but the 'What Ifs' if it doesn't; is the 'HORRIFYING' factor. I can speak as you can. Your Hyst. went well. Mine did not, and I will never be able to go back to the person I was before, like millions of other women. I have a daughter who is 23 years old. In my personal opinion, and what I went through, and now deal with daily and life long; if she was told she needed a Hyst. --- I would fight it with my every breath and whatever a motherly heart would do to protect her child. I would not want her to take that chance to bear what I do now. I just hope you get this, Toodles. I hate to repeat myself, but there is not going back. It is a matter of other alternatives which are sadly not shared with women. Too many thousands of doctors are misleading women into unnecessary Hysts. for money, power, and greed. I know this first hand, and would never let this happen to a loved one; especially, my own daughter. My husband would back me up on this, and to save his daughter also from the possibility of this happening to her, and most likely - probability. This would be something you and your husband would feel opposite of, but let me ask you this, (and I do not know if you have a daughter) if having a daughter, and she told she needs a Hyst., after even hearing from someone as myself, even one person, with all these other people and their voices; would you take the chance with your own daughter to wind up as I am now? If you do have a daughter; just please help her with every possible alternative. This is how much I care about you, Toodles, and for you, personally, what I would want to convey to you, if you were right here next to me, in person.
On a final note, I attended the Hers Foundation Conference in Pasadena, Ca. a couple years ago. I went there to see if I could find help for relief of the aftermath of physical problems after my Hyst.. The trip was so hard on me. It due to the symptoms of the Hyst., and I barely made it, but I did. It was that important to me to find information and help. I also could barely afford it. Get my point? I was at a point, after seeing five (5) other GYNs for help after this Hyst., and nobody could give me help; I went to this Hers conference. I was, in my head, begging for help and answers as to why I felt the way I did and do. Plus, the Gyn who performed the Hyst. on me finally passed me off with a scratching of the head; so to speak, and said, "Well, I guess you need to get a second opinion as to why you don't feel right. I have never had any patient have any problems after a Hyst." Gee, where have I heard that before... (Only from other countless women hearing the same from Gyns who castrated them. Why would they all have this same 'standard' statement?
I saw a lot there. I realized for the first time, with a video shown, and pictures, of what happens to a female's body when having this surgery. I was never shown/told by my GYN that all these nerves are severed, (AND with my RSD nerve disease, it should have sent up a 'red flag' for him; since he was
well aware I had it years before, plus I gave him current articles and brochures a month before the Hyst.) plus ligaments also severed, and tendons; and the prolapse of bowels and bladder; the shortening of the cervix, and all the other that goes along with a uterus taken to leave a female with a major part of her sexual 'part' taken - just like cutting off half a man's penis and cutting off his testicles. It is worse for women, as it just cannot be seen. A man would not suffer what women have happen with prolapse of organs. Plus, I found out about adhesions inside the body, and how infections can happen. I found out that removing a uterus can be worse on a female, and lead to heart problems and bone problems. This is a lot, but why didn't my GYN tell me of any of this, and I had to find this out on my own, but only AFTERWARDS. See, I will repeat myself, but have to reitterate that I had faith in my doctor of 18 years, and felt my welfare and health was his primary concern. He said I was way too anemic, and had to have the surgery right away; that I could not afford to wait another month. Well, I found out later that my fantastic insurance through a stock brokerage firm I worked at, (and I had to take a 'Leave of Absence' due to a major foot infection in my right leg, and also injured my right leg due to favoring my left; finally sent an orthopedic specialist to decide I had to quit working) this insurance was due to expire after the first of the next year; and why this GYN was pushing me to have this Hyst. by Jan. 31st of 2003. It wasn't the 'schpil' he gave me about me not being able to survive one more menstration period. It was because my insurance was no longer, come 2004, with my "great insurance" company, and he and his office had no idea, and certainly could not ask what my plans were after that. It would have sent up a red flag as to why they would ask this. It would have sounded strange; therefore, get me in there with the timing.
So, at this conference during a break, I went outside, and I was crying. I was so mad and upset at the doctor who did this to me; yet, I was glad to have a better understanding as to why I feel the way I do. I could not believe a surgery changed my whole life, physically and sexually. But as I was on this break outside during this conference...
I saw a young woman sitting on a bench and crying horrifically. I went up to her; as I was concerned. She had a cell phone in her hand. I said, "Are you okay?" She looked so young. She said, "I just got off the phone with my mother and also spoke to my son. He is four years old, and my Mom is watching him while I am here. But, I heard my son's voice, and I had to hang up." She explained why...
She said she had an unnecessary Hyst. a year prior. She found out afterwards she did not need it. It was due to a small fibroid, and she, with researching afterwards, found this out, but also by coming to the conference. She was already told (afterwards) she did not need the Hyst., but she was, as I was, with being there at this conference, trying and being hopeful that there was help to reclaim our bodies physically, and get some answers to some very important questions, and what may help physically and such. She had such same symptoms as I do. I found that interesting. She said, "Oh, you saw me crying?" I said I did and why I came to her. She said, "I could not handle talking with my son. His voice just upset me because I know I cannot have anymore children, and I want more children! This doctor took this all away. How could a doctor do this?" I asked her how old she was. She said she was 26 years old. (She was about six years older than my own daughter). She said she felt so ruined because she so hoped for more children, felt she was so stupid and naive to let this doctor do this, put her faith in him, and also having physical problems now with her bladder, abdominal pain, and fatigue. She said, "I am only 26 years old, and I find out from other doctors afterwards, and now being here; that there were alternatives, and that the surgery was not needed, and I did not have to have my ovaries removed either; I feel as if I want to throw up. I mean it. My husband is so upset too. He is here with me." I said, "What a great man." Well, we gave each other a hug. I shed a bit of light on my own personal reason for being there, but it was then time to go back in; as the break was over. I got her email address, and have tried to stay in touch with her. I did say to her, as we were walking back in, "I am not trying to preach to you, but I am a mother of a daughter who is old enough to have children. I am saying, as a mother, you must love your son very much, and why you cried when you heard his voice. You hold onto that, and transfer those tears with thinking of how much you do love him, and you have him, and he is priceless, and you can think in your mind that if you had another child, you would give that child love coming from you - so give it to your son instead. He will get a 'Double Whammy' of Love." She laughed, and I went back into that conference with a bit of a renewed spirit that I may have helped another female in this 'plight' of a Hyst. gone bad...
I am sorry this is a lot of reading, but I hope I have done some good here, and shed some light for everyone. I look at myself, and say, "Oh, how I wish I could go back to 'BH' (Before Hysterectomy). My children think that I will just get better and wait for that day. I wish with all my heart that was the case. They knew who I was prior to this surgery, and what a vibrant and esteemed achiever I was at anything. They miss that part of their mother, and this could be what breaks my heart most of all; so... this is another painful aftermath of a Hyst. being done. The emotions of love are so hard to endure at times. Just like this young woman I met at the conference, and she had emotions for her son, and also the child(ren) who will not be...
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ATTA GIRL, NORA...
Every body is different, but I know this... If I would have spoken to someone as myself, who have and realize the same symptoms I have; I would not have taken the chance to have this done. Toodles, you are so lucky. Even with the research you said you did, it could all be done, but the 'What Ifs' if it doesn't; is the 'HORRIFYING' factor. I can speak as you can. Your Hyst. went well. Mine did not, and I will never be able to go back to the person I was before, like millions of other women. I have a daughter who is 23 years old. In my personal opinion, and what I went through, and now deal with daily and life long; if she was told she needed a Hyst. --- I would fight it with my every breath and whatever a motherly heart would do to protect her child. I would not want her to take that chance to bear what I do now. I just hope you get this, Toodles. I hate to repeat myself, but there is not going back. It is a matter of other alternatives which are sadly not shared with women. Too many thousands of doctors are misleading women into unnecessary Hysts. for money, power, and greed. I know this first hand, and would never let this happen to a loved one; especially, my own daughter. My husband would back me up on this, and to save his daughter also from the possibility of this happening to her, and most likely - probability. This would be something you and your husband would feel opposite of, but let me ask you this, (and I do not know if you have a daughter) if having a daughter, and she told she needs a Hyst., after even hearing from someone as myself, even one person, with all these other people and their voices; would you take the chance with your own daughter to wind up as I am now? If you do have a daughter; just please help her with every possible alternative. This is how much I care about you, Toodles, and for you, personally, what I would want to convey to you, if you were right here next to me, in person.
On a final note, I attended the Hers Foundation Conference in Pasadena, Ca. a couple years ago. I went there to see if I could find help for relief of the aftermath of physical problems after my Hyst.. The trip was so hard on me. It due to the symptoms of the Hyst., and I barely made it, but I did. It was that important to me to find information and help. I also could barely afford it. Get my point? I was at a point, after seeing five (5) other GYNs for help after this Hyst., and nobody could give me help; I went to this Hers conference. I was, in my head, begging for help and answers as to why I felt the way I did and do. Plus, the Gyn who performed the Hyst. on me finally passed me off with a scratching of the head; so to speak, and said, "Well, I guess you need to get a second opinion as to why you don't feel right. I have never had any patient have any problems after a Hyst." Gee, where have I heard that before... (Only from other countless women hearing the same from Gyns who castrated them. Why would they all have this same 'standard' statement?
I saw a lot there. I realized for the first time, with a video shown, and pictures, of what happens to a female's body when having this surgery. I was never shown/told by my GYN that all these nerves are severed, (AND with my RSD nerve disease, it should have sent up a 'red flag' for him; since he was
well aware I had it years before, plus I gave him current articles and brochures a month before the Hyst.) plus ligaments also severed, and tendons; and the prolapse of bowels and bladder; the shortening of the cervix, and all the other that goes along with a uterus taken to leave a female with a major part of her sexual 'part' taken - just like cutting off half a man's penis and cutting off his testicles. It is worse for women, as it just cannot be seen. A man would not suffer what women have happen with prolapse of organs. Plus, I found out about adhesions inside the body, and how infections can happen. I found out that removing a uterus can be worse on a female, and lead to heart problems and bone problems. This is a lot, but why didn't my GYN tell me of any of this, and I had to find this out on my own, but only AFTERWARDS. See, I will repeat myself, but have to reitterate that I had faith in my doctor of 18 years, and felt my welfare and health was his primary concern. He said I was way too anemic, and had to have the surgery right away; that I could not afford to wait another month. Well, I found out later that my fantastic insurance through a stock brokerage firm I worked at, (and I had to take a 'Leave of Absence' due to a major foot infection in my right leg, and also injured my right leg due to favoring my left; finally sent an orthopedic specialist to decide I had to quit working) this insurance was due to expire after the first of the next year; and why this GYN was pushing me to have this Hyst. by Jan. 31st of 2003. It wasn't the 'schpil' he gave me about me not being able to survive one more menstration period. It was because my insurance was no longer, come 2004, with my "great insurance" company, and he and his office had no idea, and certainly could not ask what my plans were after that. It would have sent up a red flag as to why they would ask this. It would have sounded strange; therefore, get me in there with the timing.
So, at this conference during a break, I went outside, and I was crying. I was so mad and upset at the doctor who did this to me; yet, I was glad to have a better understanding as to why I feel the way I do. I could not believe a surgery changed my whole life, physically and sexually. But as I was on this break outside during this conference...
I saw a young woman sitting on a bench and crying horrifically. I went up to her; as I was concerned. She had a cell phone in her hand. I said, "Are you okay?" She looked so young. She said, "I just got off the phone with my mother and also spoke to my son. He is four years old, and my Mom is watching him while I am here. But, I heard my son's voice, and I had to hang up." She explained why...
She said she had an unnecessary Hyst. a year prior. She found out afterwards she did not need it. It was due to a small fibroid, and she, with researching afterwards, found this out, but also by coming to the conference. She was already told (afterwards) she did not need the Hyst., but she was, as I was, with being there at this conference, trying and being hopeful that there was help to reclaim our bodies physically, and get some answers to some very important questions, and what may help physically and such. She had such same symptoms as I do. I found that interesting. She said, "Oh, you saw me crying?" I said I did and why I came to her. She said, "I could not handle talking with my son. His voice just upset me because I know I cannot have anymore children, and I want more children! This doctor took this all away. How could a doctor do this?" I asked her how old she was. She said she was 26 years old. (She was about six years older than my own daughter). She said she felt so ruined because she so hoped for more children, felt she was so stupid and naive to let this doctor do this, put her faith in him, and also having physical problems now with her bladder, abdominal pain, and fatigue. She said, "I am only 26 years old, and I find out from other doctors afterwards, and now being here; that there were alternatives, and that the surgery was not needed, and I did not have to have my ovaries removed either; I feel as if I want to throw up. I mean it. My husband is so upset too. He is here with me." I said, "What a great man." Well, we gave each other a hug. I shed a bit of light on my own personal reason for being there, but it was then time to go back in; as the break was over. I got her email address, and have tried to stay in touch with her. I did say to her, as we were walking back in, "I am not trying to preach to you, but I am a mother of a daughter who is old enough to have children. I am saying, as a mother, you must love your son very much, and why you cried when you heard his voice. You hold onto that, and transfer those tears with thinking of how much you do love him, and you have him, and he is priceless, and you can think in your mind that if you had another child, you would give that child love coming from you - so give it to your son instead. He will get a 'Double Whammy' of Love." She laughed, and I went back into that conference with a bit of a renewed spirit that I may have helped another female in this 'plight' of a Hyst. gone bad...
I am sorry this is a lot of reading, but I hope I have done some good here, and shed some light for everyone. I look at myself, and say, "Oh, how I wish I could go back to 'BH' (Before Hysterectomy). My children think that I will just get better and wait for that day. I wish with all my heart that was the case. They knew who I was prior to this surgery, and what a vibrant and esteemed achiever I was at anything. They miss that part of their mother, and this could be what breaks my heart most of all; so... this is another painful aftermath of a Hyst. being done. The emotions of love are so hard to endure at times. Just like this young woman I met at the conference, and she had emotions for her son, and also the child(ren) who will not be...
February 21, 2010 - 11:16pmThis Comment
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