I totally understand everything you say. It sure does bring back memories. I remember all that same weakness like it were yesterday. I remember saying the exact same thing about how I was only in bed 5 days, why is it so hard to walk. It felt like I hadn't walked in months and was suddenly having to re-learn it. They put me in a harness at the hospital and walked me down the hallway like a dog, so-to-speak. It was physical therapy time...and I remember feeling like, "why does walking feel so foreign?"
I suffered a "little" depression as well. I had also been told I had just gone through a major surgery as well as having my brain operated on. Sometimes these cysts can disrupt normal brain activity and in my case, it actually caused some damage because it is so large. I still battle with bouts of depression. Like my chemical balances are all messed up. But I cannot take anti-depressants because they increase problems with neurological symptoms for me, so I try to keep a positive mental outlook on my own and when I start to feel down, I try to write more and focus on my kids. I'm also going through a separation with my husband after 15 years together, and that only adds to my stress and depression at times. Writing is a huge outlet for me. I write articles for companies, I've written my auto-biography, "It's all in Your Head," that I am about to try to get published. It is the story of what I went through with my cyst, so look for it one day on the shelves. I will also let the readers know when and if I do find a publisher.
I think you will be amazed at how well you do recovering from your surgery. That Mayfield clamp is a bear though...that was probably more painful than my incisions by far. The clamps were put so tight in my scalp during the first surgery that my scalp and skull were bruised for over a month. I would use three icebags on my head at one time...one over each area where a clamp was tightened. I looked hilarious! But eventually that went away, the back problems went away, my strength came back, and with each thing that got better, it brightened my attitude and my spirits. Each day that I got closer to feeling like my old self, I grew happier. I hope the same will be for you.
Hang in there. Down the road I may be back in the same boat again and needing all you guys to lean on if I ever have this other surgery for my Chiari. I hear it's a real bear! I may be the one needing the encouragement all over again. But for now, I will offer mine to whoever needs it because I have been right where you are. And to me, people who suffer with brain defects and surgery to correct them, are some of the strongest people out there!
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Hi Melanie,
I totally understand everything you say. It sure does bring back memories. I remember all that same weakness like it were yesterday. I remember saying the exact same thing about how I was only in bed 5 days, why is it so hard to walk. It felt like I hadn't walked in months and was suddenly having to re-learn it. They put me in a harness at the hospital and walked me down the hallway like a dog, so-to-speak. It was physical therapy time...and I remember feeling like, "why does walking feel so foreign?"
I suffered a "little" depression as well. I had also been told I had just gone through a major surgery as well as having my brain operated on. Sometimes these cysts can disrupt normal brain activity and in my case, it actually caused some damage because it is so large. I still battle with bouts of depression. Like my chemical balances are all messed up. But I cannot take anti-depressants because they increase problems with neurological symptoms for me, so I try to keep a positive mental outlook on my own and when I start to feel down, I try to write more and focus on my kids. I'm also going through a separation with my husband after 15 years together, and that only adds to my stress and depression at times. Writing is a huge outlet for me. I write articles for companies, I've written my auto-biography, "It's all in Your Head," that I am about to try to get published. It is the story of what I went through with my cyst, so look for it one day on the shelves. I will also let the readers know when and if I do find a publisher.
I think you will be amazed at how well you do recovering from your surgery. That Mayfield clamp is a bear though...that was probably more painful than my incisions by far. The clamps were put so tight in my scalp during the first surgery that my scalp and skull were bruised for over a month. I would use three icebags on my head at one time...one over each area where a clamp was tightened. I looked hilarious! But eventually that went away, the back problems went away, my strength came back, and with each thing that got better, it brightened my attitude and my spirits. Each day that I got closer to feeling like my old self, I grew happier. I hope the same will be for you.
Hang in there. Down the road I may be back in the same boat again and needing all you guys to lean on if I ever have this other surgery for my Chiari. I hear it's a real bear! I may be the one needing the encouragement all over again. But for now, I will offer mine to whoever needs it because I have been right where you are. And to me, people who suffer with brain defects and surgery to correct them, are some of the strongest people out there!
February 16, 2010 - 11:19amThis Comment
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