Thank goodness for the internet. Because except for my husband, my kids, my mom and my naturopath, it is the only place I get any real response.
Having my family helps against the pervasive isolation I experience. But I don't know anyone here in the town where I live, that is like me. And outside of my family, there is hardly anyone in my town, any longer, who is interested in knowing me, or if they are, it's a well-kept secret. :-) I had to look past my own real life, to the internet, in my hunger for interaction for other people. Thank God for the net.
I sympathize with how very isolating it must be when also living alone. I give credit to you for being able to manage. My husband saves my bacon on a regular basis. Awhile back, I went a year without going into a store. I just ... stayed home ... all the time.
I know what you mean about the bank. Before I finally had accepted that this was beyond me and left it to my husband, I would do the bank. And I'd have to write stuff down and rehearse before I went in there, know exactly what to do, if I was to have a HOPE of things working. If things went differently than I'd planned for, I was lost. I had to count on the teller knowing exactly what she was doing, and grit my teeth trying like mad to understand WHAT she way saying. I walked out of there countless time with absolutely no clue what had happened, hoping I could piece it together at home, with no idea if I'd gotten or deposited the right amount of money and in such a stress-induced head stone and body stone that it took all I had not to bump into people or walls or fall down the stairs on the way out.
And yeah, it's alot like being drunk. Or on a bad acid trip.
Have you found anything that helps you with your symptoms? Dietary, or supplements? Pacing yourself? Scheduled (and unscheduled :-) naps?
Let me know. There have been some things that have helped take me from that state I described to something much higher-functioning and less distressing.
I hope you write back. Or you can contact me through my website or my new blog.
Take care. Have hope that things will change for you.