Grendels04,
I'm sorry for your loss and frustration.
It is possible to dress in a sexually appealing manner without being distasteful.
I'm not saying it's right, but when a woman dresses a certain way, she attracts men whether or not that was her intention.
You seem to be open to the looks you are attracting, which is great.
Speaking only from my own observations in many cases a man will think a woman is looking for a partner when she dresses a certain way, and when he goes up and speaks with her, she turns him down without considering him. If you are actually looking for a partner, then by all means, dress like it. I'm just warning that dressing that way WILL attract men to you.
A woman is disrespecting herself if she needs that attraction to feel that she is sexy. I'm not saying that every person who dresses that way is disrespecting themselves, only that they should feel sexy even if they don't get those looks.*
I do not mean that dressing "slutty" makes a person a slut.
My definition of slut- a person who will sleep with almost anyone, with few standards.
Therefore, the only thing that makes a person a slut is sleeping with many random people and not caring who they are sleeping with.
I do not believe that it's wrong for a person to sleep around, if they are doing it (safely) for their own pleasure with consenting partners who are doing it for the same reasons whom they will also try to please. (Not because they are drunk, not because they are being pressured into it, not to make up for a void in another area of their life etc. But BECAUSE THEY WANT TO).
I am not suggesting that you "pretend" anything, I am suggesting quite the contrary!
You should NOT feel guilty about doing anything that makes you comfortable, especially when it makes those you are with feel comfortable.
You seem to be a wonderful, confident woman and you will find someone who wants the same things you want, definitely.
Have fun!!
:]
*I have a very sexy friend who dresses modestly, is brilliant, funny, and diplomatic. She knows she is sexy, yet men don't try to pick her up. She is very friendly, but guys just assume she is not looking for anyone since she dresses the way she does. Meaning that men WILL think a woman is looking for something when she dresses to show off her body.
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Grendels04,
I'm sorry for your loss and frustration.
It is possible to dress in a sexually appealing manner without being distasteful.
I'm not saying it's right, but when a woman dresses a certain way, she attracts men whether or not that was her intention.
You seem to be open to the looks you are attracting, which is great.
Speaking only from my own observations in many cases a man will think a woman is looking for a partner when she dresses a certain way, and when he goes up and speaks with her, she turns him down without considering him. If you are actually looking for a partner, then by all means, dress like it. I'm just warning that dressing that way WILL attract men to you.
A woman is disrespecting herself if she needs that attraction to feel that she is sexy. I'm not saying that every person who dresses that way is disrespecting themselves, only that they should feel sexy even if they don't get those looks.*
I do not mean that dressing "slutty" makes a person a slut.
My definition of slut- a person who will sleep with almost anyone, with few standards.
Therefore, the only thing that makes a person a slut is sleeping with many random people and not caring who they are sleeping with.
I do not believe that it's wrong for a person to sleep around, if they are doing it (safely) for their own pleasure with consenting partners who are doing it for the same reasons whom they will also try to please. (Not because they are drunk, not because they are being pressured into it, not to make up for a void in another area of their life etc. But BECAUSE THEY WANT TO).
I am not suggesting that you "pretend" anything, I am suggesting quite the contrary!
You should NOT feel guilty about doing anything that makes you comfortable, especially when it makes those you are with feel comfortable.
You seem to be a wonderful, confident woman and you will find someone who wants the same things you want, definitely.
Have fun!!
:]
*I have a very sexy friend who dresses modestly, is brilliant, funny, and diplomatic. She knows she is sexy, yet men don't try to pick her up. She is very friendly, but guys just assume she is not looking for anyone since she dresses the way she does. Meaning that men WILL think a woman is looking for something when she dresses to show off her body.
July 16, 2009 - 7:29amThis Comment
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