Instead of arguing about WHY eating disorders happen ... what/who causes them ... isn't it better to focus on and educate oneself and others on HOW people can best recover from them?
Most of the experts agree that they really don't know what causes eating disorders, so what is the point of arguing?
So if one gets a 'fix' on how to set 'boundaries', that is going to be what SOLVES their eating disorder issues?
I think NOT. So what is the point of talking about 'boundaries'?
If well-meaning parents (particularly mothers) deprived their child at any early age in some way, so it's best that one separates themselves from their mother and other family members? And that's going to help - HOW?
I spent years blaming my mother for my eating disorder and other problems, until I finally figured out that my eating disorder and other issues had more to do about ME and how I was 'wired' than anything to do with what she did or did not do.
As far as her being 'controlling' in any way, nothing could have been further from the truth. My problems with my mother began when at an early age, I was so let down to find out that she did not meet my definition of 'perfect mom'.
Poor me. Now I realize that my mom had (and has) the right to be who she is. If who she is didn't match up to my expectations, too bad. She worked her butt off to do the best she could to give her kids a good life and never turned her back on us once when we went through difficult challenges. She was always there for us. Now that she is old, I realize how much she loved (and loves) me.
I am recovered now and have a daughter who has an eating disorder. Was I, in some way, the cause of that?
Sure. Genetics played a role and likely my 'less than perfection' at motherhood did, as well. Lucky for me, my daughter cuts me a lot more slack than I did my mom. And like my mom, I will never turn my back on my daughter. I will support her recovery in any way that I am capable of doing.
I read all the latest research, buy the latest books, listen to smart researchers and attend as many conferences as I can to learn as much as I can about what I can do to help myself, my daughter and others.
Here is an example of a conference that sounds interesting upcoming on Dec. 3 at in Corning, NY.
If I lived in or near NY, I would attend.
"Inside the Brain/Outside the Box"
"The goal is to better understand how starvation affects the brain and explore alternative therapies and how they maximize the brain's inherent potential to heal, said registered dietitian Carolyn Hodges Chaffee, the owner of the Elmira eating disorder treatment centers.
Robarge died in 2000 after a long struggle with an eating disorder. She was 13.
Dr. Richard Levine, the keynote speaker, will discuss the impact starvation has on the functioning of the brain. Levine, a nationally recognized expert, is a professor of pediatrics and psychiatry at the Pennsylvania State University College of Medicine.
Levine is also chief of the Division of Adolescent Medicine and Eating Disorders at Pennsylvania State Children's Hospital and the Milton S. Hershey Medical Center in Hershey, Pa.
Jeannetta Burpee, an occupational therapist at St. Joseph's Hospital in Elmira, will discuss the role sensory integration -- the neurological process that organizes sensations from one's own body and the environment -- plays in the treatment of eating disorders.
Psychotherapist Andrew Seubert of Corning will highlight recent findings about the functioning of various areas of the brain in eating disorder patients. He will also discuss nutritional and non-pharmacological interventions that can restore brain balance and health.
Clare Brown, program director of the Sol Stone Center, will discuss and demonstrate the use of art therapy, yoga, meditation and other alternative therapies in the treatment of eating disorders.
A panel of patients who have used alternative therapies will talk about their experiences to conclude the seminar, according to a news release.
The seminar begins at 8 a.m. Dec. 3 with registration and concludes at 4 p.m. Registration is $75 before Nov. 26 and $100 after Nov. 26. Family and group rates are available upon request."