Hi, Anon, and welcome to EmpowHer. Thank you for your question. Let's see if I can be of some help here.
The bones in your spine are called vertabrae. They have different names and labels based on where they are. Here's a good diagram:
L stands for lumbar, and S stands for sacrum. So L4 and L5 are your fourth and fifth lumbar vertabrae, and S1 is the first vertabra located in the sacrum, which is even lower. Your bone mineral density test showed that these are the bones with the lowest density. So you're much more vulnerable to cracks, fractures and pain where these bones are. I suspect you do a lot of lifting, which is tough on these bones and hurts.
After the BMD, did your doctor recommend anything? Physical therapy or exercises? Did you talk about any of the prescription medicines available now to help with osteoporosis and loss of bone density?
Here is one video on an exercise to help with back strength:
And here's a YouTube video of one personal trainer's Top 8 Low Back Exercises Without Any Equipment:
And this page gives some valuable cautions and tips/info:
Do you have the ability to do yoga in your house? Perhaps buy some yoga DVDs for the television and get a yoga mat? Here's an EmpowHer article on how yoga can help relieve lower-back pain (clicking on the orange links in the article will show you pictures of the poses):
Anon, I'm really proud of you for writing in. I know that as a caretaker, you probably feel that you have very little time for yourself. But it's important that you try, because that's how you keep your own strength up. You can't take care of your partner without taking care of your own health, right? Do you get proper nutrition? Do you take vitamin supplements besides the calcium?
You are an important woman worth good health care. You need the exercise and nutrition, not only for your partner, but also for you. Please make yourself a priority so that these bones don't get weaker and weaker. With a home as beautiful as yours sounds, you want to stay in it as long as possible. I wish you well. If we can help with anything more, please don't hesitate to write back, OK?