Thank you for your question, I am so sorry you are torn on what to do about your boyfriend. I won't give you advice, because thinking things over and weighing your options is best for you to do but I will give you my two cents...
First of all, I think it is absolutely, 100% normal to have sexual fantasies, fetishes, and desires that some people would consider "weird". HOWEVER, putting you in an awkward situation to fulfill them and then belittling you when you don't is not acceptable. I can tell you that unless you live in a porno, I don't think most women (whether 24, 30, or 60) have masturbated on their balconies for others to watch or attempted to seduce their dildo salesman.
Calling you things such as "little girl" or "inexperienced" is likely to be his way of not being able to handle hearing "no" from you. There is nothing wrong with saying no to something you feel uncomfortable doing, but there IS something wrong with the starting of name calling, temper tantrums, and leaving the house.
You asked if these kinds of things he asks for make relationships healthy.
They can...but only if BOTH of you have these desires and enjoy them together. It is not healthy if only he desires you to do this and only he enjoys it.
Good Luck with whatever you decide, I am sure that it will be what's best for you.
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Dear preciousgift1,
Thank you for your question, I am so sorry you are torn on what to do about your boyfriend. I won't give you advice, because thinking things over and weighing your options is best for you to do but I will give you my two cents...
First of all, I think it is absolutely, 100% normal to have sexual fantasies, fetishes, and desires that some people would consider "weird". HOWEVER, putting you in an awkward situation to fulfill them and then belittling you when you don't is not acceptable. I can tell you that unless you live in a porno, I don't think most women (whether 24, 30, or 60) have masturbated on their balconies for others to watch or attempted to seduce their dildo salesman.
Calling you things such as "little girl" or "inexperienced" is likely to be his way of not being able to handle hearing "no" from you. There is nothing wrong with saying no to something you feel uncomfortable doing, but there IS something wrong with the starting of name calling, temper tantrums, and leaving the house.
You asked if these kinds of things he asks for make relationships healthy.
They can...but only if BOTH of you have these desires and enjoy them together. It is not healthy if only he desires you to do this and only he enjoys it.
Good Luck with whatever you decide, I am sure that it will be what's best for you.
September 10, 2009 - 5:38amThis Comment
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