I've been where you are before (though not in a union) and I know exactly how you feel.
Work is, literally, the center of our lives: we wake up and get ready for work, we go to work, and then we see what else we can get done after work. When there is something at work that is so stressful to us, it's incredibly hard to let it go. And the fact that you're feeling the effects physically isn't surprising -- it's your body telling you that something isn't right.
One thing you should do is document, document, document. On your own, at home. Start a work diary either on paper or in the computer and, without emotion, just write down anything objectively that goes on during the day that illustrates this problem. This should be as objective as possible -- facts, when, where, what was said, what you said in return, and outcome. This could become your backup if you ever have to show that you were fired without cause. And I think documenting will make you feel that you are in control of one part of this, at least.
Yes, EXERCISE. It's great that you can do it at lunch, and here's why: You'll feel like you're getting something for yourself back out of the workday.
When you are in a conversation with her or are working near her, practice staying in touch with your breathing. Lots of times when we are in a stressful situation, we take very shallow breaths or hardly breathe at all. This makes our stress response worse. Instead, we should be concentrating on long, slow, deep breaths that inflate our diaphragm.
Is there anything you can do in the morning that will make you feel that you are in more control of how you feel? For instance, can you arrive 15 minutes earlier than she does, simply so that you can get oriented and calm before she arrives?
When you work for a jerk, you have to teach yourself how not to take things personally even if they are personal. Boy, do I realize how hard that is. However, you can do it. It is like as soon as a sentence is out of their mouth, you have to scrub away the personal feelings and just listen to the directive. Don't let them get to you. Don't let her rile you. Don't give her the satisfaction of making you lose your temper or cry. Just simply think to yourself, "Ah, another thing to document," and go on.
You can do this. You can. Hang in there. I'll be eager to read your updates.
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Hey, Miscortes,
I've been where you are before (though not in a union) and I know exactly how you feel.
Work is, literally, the center of our lives: we wake up and get ready for work, we go to work, and then we see what else we can get done after work. When there is something at work that is so stressful to us, it's incredibly hard to let it go. And the fact that you're feeling the effects physically isn't surprising -- it's your body telling you that something isn't right.
One thing you should do is document, document, document. On your own, at home. Start a work diary either on paper or in the computer and, without emotion, just write down anything objectively that goes on during the day that illustrates this problem. This should be as objective as possible -- facts, when, where, what was said, what you said in return, and outcome. This could become your backup if you ever have to show that you were fired without cause. And I think documenting will make you feel that you are in control of one part of this, at least.
Yes, EXERCISE. It's great that you can do it at lunch, and here's why: You'll feel like you're getting something for yourself back out of the workday.
When you are in a conversation with her or are working near her, practice staying in touch with your breathing. Lots of times when we are in a stressful situation, we take very shallow breaths or hardly breathe at all. This makes our stress response worse. Instead, we should be concentrating on long, slow, deep breaths that inflate our diaphragm.
Is there anything you can do in the morning that will make you feel that you are in more control of how you feel? For instance, can you arrive 15 minutes earlier than she does, simply so that you can get oriented and calm before she arrives?
When you work for a jerk, you have to teach yourself how not to take things personally even if they are personal. Boy, do I realize how hard that is. However, you can do it. It is like as soon as a sentence is out of their mouth, you have to scrub away the personal feelings and just listen to the directive. Don't let them get to you. Don't let her rile you. Don't give her the satisfaction of making you lose your temper or cry. Just simply think to yourself, "Ah, another thing to document," and go on.
You can do this. You can. Hang in there. I'll be eager to read your updates.
September 28, 2009 - 9:05amThis Comment
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