You MUST leave him. Do you understand? You are in danger here. This is a situation that is escalating. For 18 months, he wasn't violent, and now he is hitting you, bruising you, nearly breaking a bone and pulling your hair out?
And yet you say you love him and can't be without him? And you think he might be violent and less interested in sex because you have put some weight on?
No. No no no no no.
This is a physically abusive situation, Monbon. What he is doing is assaulting you, which is against the law. You don't "get back" at a criminal by doing criminal acts yourself.
You CAN be without him, Monbon. Somewhere along the way you have lost the self-esteem and self-confidence that you used to have, and you are putting up with physical abuse that you do not deserve. I am glad you have confided in a friend. Can you go and stay with her for a while?
The only way this situation could be fixed, Monbon, is if both of you agreed to separate for a while and go to counseling. And from what you wrote, I don't see that happening.
Monbon, you don't have to do this by yourself. There are people who will answer the phone and talk to you 24/7 at the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE (7233).
If you are unsure as to whether you are being abused (I'm very sure you are), you can go here and look at some questions that might help you see your experience in another way:
Monbon, it's really important that you realize that nothing, NOTHING you could do deserves this kind of treatment or makes it all right.
Please tell us what we can do to help. If you need the name of local support services where you are, we would be honored to help you find them. Just write back and tell us your zip code or your city and state.
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Monbon,
You MUST leave him. Do you understand? You are in danger here. This is a situation that is escalating. For 18 months, he wasn't violent, and now he is hitting you, bruising you, nearly breaking a bone and pulling your hair out?
And yet you say you love him and can't be without him? And you think he might be violent and less interested in sex because you have put some weight on?
No. No no no no no.
This is a physically abusive situation, Monbon. What he is doing is assaulting you, which is against the law. You don't "get back" at a criminal by doing criminal acts yourself.
You CAN be without him, Monbon. Somewhere along the way you have lost the self-esteem and self-confidence that you used to have, and you are putting up with physical abuse that you do not deserve. I am glad you have confided in a friend. Can you go and stay with her for a while?
The only way this situation could be fixed, Monbon, is if both of you agreed to separate for a while and go to counseling. And from what you wrote, I don't see that happening.
Monbon, you don't have to do this by yourself. There are people who will answer the phone and talk to you 24/7 at the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE (7233).
If you are unsure as to whether you are being abused (I'm very sure you are), you can go here and look at some questions that might help you see your experience in another way:
http://www.ndvh.org/is-this-abuse/am-i-being-abused-2/
Monbon, it's really important that you realize that nothing, NOTHING you could do deserves this kind of treatment or makes it all right.
Please tell us what we can do to help. If you need the name of local support services where you are, we would be honored to help you find them. Just write back and tell us your zip code or your city and state.
April 5, 2010 - 11:41amThis Comment
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