I know the feeling but they don't hurt in that way. Men just don't seem to be wired that way. And I hate to say this but I think all men think of a "real" person they have met or know on occasion and play out their fantasy. Maybe it is someone the wife also knows and maybe not. My husband said it was often an actress from the movies or TV. Unfortunately that has now caused me to look at every attractive actress we wee while watching something and wonder if she is the type he would "save for later". I also review our past 35 years of tennis associations and trips and wonder who he was fantasizing about and when he might have enjoyed himself with her. I just find it so odd that women are OK with all this and it doesn't bother them. Maybe they just don't think about their guy having sex in their minds or maybe they don't think about it at all. If I had really known this is the way it had to be it certainly would have been a marriage dealbreaker. I didn't need to get married and could have been quite content to be on my own. I killed myself our whole married life trying to be the perfect wife. Maintaining my looks (I was a model when we met) being a wonderful cook, home maker, did all the financials for the family and worked too. Just too old to start over now. Don't know if it will get any easier because these revelations are fresh in my mind by just a few months.
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I know the feeling but they don't hurt in that way. Men just don't seem to be wired that way. And I hate to say this but I think all men think of a "real" person they have met or know on occasion and play out their fantasy. Maybe it is someone the wife also knows and maybe not. My husband said it was often an actress from the movies or TV. Unfortunately that has now caused me to look at every attractive actress we wee while watching something and wonder if she is the type he would "save for later". I also review our past 35 years of tennis associations and trips and wonder who he was fantasizing about and when he might have enjoyed himself with her. I just find it so odd that women are OK with all this and it doesn't bother them. Maybe they just don't think about their guy having sex in their minds or maybe they don't think about it at all. If I had really known this is the way it had to be it certainly would have been a marriage dealbreaker. I didn't need to get married and could have been quite content to be on my own. I killed myself our whole married life trying to be the perfect wife. Maintaining my looks (I was a model when we met) being a wonderful cook, home maker, did all the financials for the family and worked too. Just too old to start over now. Don't know if it will get any easier because these revelations are fresh in my mind by just a few months.
February 15, 2016 - 6:41amThis Comment
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