This is laughable!
Seriously?
So, we ask "why won't our men make love to us" and they reply "we are not sex objects" and "stop criticising us, cause we feel bad and we don't want to force ourselves"?!
Who's talking about forcing anyone? Who's talking about sex objects? And why would anyone stay in a relationship in the first place, if his girl treated him like that? I'm not saying such situations don't exist. I'm simply saying that, if your girl is THAT bad, to treat you as a sex object or insult you cause you're not one, the problem is the girlfriend, not you!
Now, I would like a real answer to another situation: You are together for at least a year, you're even living together. You can discuss everything, you adore eachother, she looks at you and you know she's meant for you. You look at her and you feel the same. Everytime you hug eachother - and you do that a lot, you think: "This is the best place in the world; your arms!" But, no kiss, no erotic touch, no suggestion that anything could go any further than a hug. And if the girl tries to do anything more, you push her away. She won't complain and she will take it for a few more days. In the end, she asks: "Why don't you want me? Am I doing something wrong?" But to no avail, since, instead of a normal answer, she ends up being blamed that she's pressuring you and the whole thing that initially started as a simple question, goes south.
So, she tries again some days later, with a different approach this time. She tells you that there's something bothering her and she would like to talk to you about it. And she uses soemething like this: "You know... There are several days now that I've been trying to get a bit closer to you. Touch you a bit more erotically, kiss you. Even make love! But you've been pushing me away. Is there something wrong? Is anything bothering you?" And you claim that several days ago, while she was in the kichen doing the dishes, covered in foam, and with a pan of boiling food next to her, you passed behind her and touched her butt! and that meant you wanted to have sex! But, one: she didn't understand it and two: she looked as if she was preoccupied and probably wouldn't have been able to have sex at that specific moment, so, it was her fault that nothing happened, because you wanted it, but she didn't even notice!
So, not only is she not having sex, but she has been blamed that it was her fault! Twice! One cause she was "pressuring", and two cause she didn't notice! The touch on the butt that meant sex, that is.
And so on...
She feels unattractive, she feels lame and unwanted.
And she keeps trying to tell you. Using different ways everytime: Explaining, giving examples, trying to put you in her shoes to make you understand how she feels... but nothing works. She even tries blaming! Maybe it would shake you a bit, and make you take action.
Nothing - no change whatsoever.
Months have passed like that. Lately, I've tried the approach of not mentioning it at all. See how it goes. It's already more than a week that he hasn't even touched me in any other way than the constant hug. I'm sure if I go on for a year, I'll be one year sex-free - if i may. I don't know... could it be hormons? Maybe a health issue? I really don't know what to do. I adore him. And I believe him when he says he adores me too. And I love the hug. I do! I would just like a bit more than that every now and then, while at it.
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This is laughable!
February 11, 2015 - 4:49amSeriously?
So, we ask "why won't our men make love to us" and they reply "we are not sex objects" and "stop criticising us, cause we feel bad and we don't want to force ourselves"?!
Who's talking about forcing anyone? Who's talking about sex objects? And why would anyone stay in a relationship in the first place, if his girl treated him like that? I'm not saying such situations don't exist. I'm simply saying that, if your girl is THAT bad, to treat you as a sex object or insult you cause you're not one, the problem is the girlfriend, not you!
Now, I would like a real answer to another situation: You are together for at least a year, you're even living together. You can discuss everything, you adore eachother, she looks at you and you know she's meant for you. You look at her and you feel the same. Everytime you hug eachother - and you do that a lot, you think: "This is the best place in the world; your arms!" But, no kiss, no erotic touch, no suggestion that anything could go any further than a hug. And if the girl tries to do anything more, you push her away. She won't complain and she will take it for a few more days. In the end, she asks: "Why don't you want me? Am I doing something wrong?" But to no avail, since, instead of a normal answer, she ends up being blamed that she's pressuring you and the whole thing that initially started as a simple question, goes south.
So, she tries again some days later, with a different approach this time. She tells you that there's something bothering her and she would like to talk to you about it. And she uses soemething like this: "You know... There are several days now that I've been trying to get a bit closer to you. Touch you a bit more erotically, kiss you. Even make love! But you've been pushing me away. Is there something wrong? Is anything bothering you?" And you claim that several days ago, while she was in the kichen doing the dishes, covered in foam, and with a pan of boiling food next to her, you passed behind her and touched her butt! and that meant you wanted to have sex! But, one: she didn't understand it and two: she looked as if she was preoccupied and probably wouldn't have been able to have sex at that specific moment, so, it was her fault that nothing happened, because you wanted it, but she didn't even notice!
So, not only is she not having sex, but she has been blamed that it was her fault! Twice! One cause she was "pressuring", and two cause she didn't notice! The touch on the butt that meant sex, that is.
And so on...
She feels unattractive, she feels lame and unwanted.
And she keeps trying to tell you. Using different ways everytime: Explaining, giving examples, trying to put you in her shoes to make you understand how she feels... but nothing works. She even tries blaming! Maybe it would shake you a bit, and make you take action.
Nothing - no change whatsoever.
Months have passed like that. Lately, I've tried the approach of not mentioning it at all. See how it goes. It's already more than a week that he hasn't even touched me in any other way than the constant hug. I'm sure if I go on for a year, I'll be one year sex-free - if i may. I don't know... could it be hormons? Maybe a health issue? I really don't know what to do. I adore him. And I believe him when he says he adores me too. And I love the hug. I do! I would just like a bit more than that every now and then, while at it.
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