I was due in late February; I don't remember the exact day. Although I did think about it occasionally that month, it passed by without as much emotional turmoil as I expected. But now June 24th approaches and I am facing the first anniversary of the day I rushed to the emergency room already knowing in my heart that my pregnancy was over. And I am struggling. I think it is made worse because I am pregnant again and due July 3rd. It is entirely possible that this baby could be born on the same date that my last baby left me. I really don't know if I could handle that. It is such a roller coaster between anticipating the birth of my daughter, preparing my two-year-old to be a big sister, and remembering what was one of the worst days of my life. I know I will make it through, but it's still harder than I imagined. How does one mourn and celebrate at the same time?