I guess you have a few things to figure out, and only you know the answers. I can help you brainstorm!
1. Why did you move out in the first place?
2. You are afraid of hurting your girlfriend's feelings, but it does not sound like you two are really friends. She never calls you back on the phone, she only calls you when she needs something for herself. It is nice to care about someone, but a friend is someone who reciprocates this caring, right?
3. If this man is wanting you to move in, at the same time he is "feeling the strain of his relationship with his sister" (since they are roommates)...would it not be better for there to be a clean break? He needs to take responsibility for what is happening between him and his sister and not use you as a filler roommate. If you two have love for each other, take it slow and do not move in during a tumultuous time in his family relations. He and his sister need to decide for themselves what are their best living arrangements without adding you into the mix; it's almost too convenient for him to and would question you moving in for love versus another reason (for him to avoid financial burden, for him to avoid difficult conversations with his sister, for him to avoid feeling lonely, etc). These "other reasons" are reasons you would NOT want to move in with him, correct?
My two cents: allow your feelings for this man to grow stronger while living separately. He can find other living arrangements, as can his sister, and you can allow each relationship to grow naturally with each individual person.
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I guess you have a few things to figure out, and only you know the answers. I can help you brainstorm!
1. Why did you move out in the first place?
2. You are afraid of hurting your girlfriend's feelings, but it does not sound like you two are really friends. She never calls you back on the phone, she only calls you when she needs something for herself. It is nice to care about someone, but a friend is someone who reciprocates this caring, right?
3. If this man is wanting you to move in, at the same time he is "feeling the strain of his relationship with his sister" (since they are roommates)...would it not be better for there to be a clean break? He needs to take responsibility for what is happening between him and his sister and not use you as a filler roommate. If you two have love for each other, take it slow and do not move in during a tumultuous time in his family relations. He and his sister need to decide for themselves what are their best living arrangements without adding you into the mix; it's almost too convenient for him to and would question you moving in for love versus another reason (for him to avoid financial burden, for him to avoid difficult conversations with his sister, for him to avoid feeling lonely, etc). These "other reasons" are reasons you would NOT want to move in with him, correct?
My two cents: allow your feelings for this man to grow stronger while living separately. He can find other living arrangements, as can his sister, and you can allow each relationship to grow naturally with each individual person.
What are your thoughts?
April 7, 2011 - 11:52amThis Comment
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