I think you are thinking about relationships in a very unhealthy way, if I may be blunt!
Relationships are not about "getting someone to love me" or getting them to PROVE they love you because they will change their behavior.
Relationships are about MUTUAL love, respect, communication, trust, honesty (and a million other things) that exist WITHOUT a person changing who they are, and without a person changing behaviors. His behavior of cheating is not a one-time "oops!", but a series of very-well thought-out, premeditated, planned events that he sought out women, went through all the motions and words of getting them to have sex with him, and then hiding this all from you. At no point in all of his sexual conquests with multiple women did you enter his mind (except how to hide it from you), and his behaviors in no way show that he has the same level of commitment, love, honesty, respect, admiration or desire for a monogamous relationship as you do. It is your choice to decide to stay with someone whom you know does not have the same level of all of these critical components of a relationship as you do. You do not need to leave him, but know that you are choosing to stay with this person, knowing all the facts, and allowing him to treat you with less respect than you provide to him.
Happiness and love comes from you...and from you deciding what type of relationship you want and deserve from the beginning.
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I think you are thinking about relationships in a very unhealthy way, if I may be blunt!
Relationships are not about "getting someone to love me" or getting them to PROVE they love you because they will change their behavior.
Relationships are about MUTUAL love, respect, communication, trust, honesty (and a million other things) that exist WITHOUT a person changing who they are, and without a person changing behaviors. His behavior of cheating is not a one-time "oops!", but a series of very-well thought-out, premeditated, planned events that he sought out women, went through all the motions and words of getting them to have sex with him, and then hiding this all from you. At no point in all of his sexual conquests with multiple women did you enter his mind (except how to hide it from you), and his behaviors in no way show that he has the same level of commitment, love, honesty, respect, admiration or desire for a monogamous relationship as you do. It is your choice to decide to stay with someone whom you know does not have the same level of all of these critical components of a relationship as you do. You do not need to leave him, but know that you are choosing to stay with this person, knowing all the facts, and allowing him to treat you with less respect than you provide to him.
Happiness and love comes from you...and from you deciding what type of relationship you want and deserve from the beginning.
August 7, 2011 - 11:29amThis Comment
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