I'm sorry you are feeling frustrated, stressed and irritated! I have not taken anything when I'm feeling this way, as either I'm starting my period or need a nap.
You said that you were prescribed anti-depressants, but didn't like the side effects. What side effects did you have? If you were prescribed this medication, I'm wondering what the prescribing-doctor observed to warrant this medication...meaning...why do you think you were prescribed medicine in the first place? What do you think is causing your negative feelings? Why do you feel that you should NOT take anti-depressants (besides the side effects; are there different types to take that may not have the same effects)? Are you feeling depressed without a culprit, as in a possible chemical imbalance that can be helped with medication, or did you have a recent life event (relationship problems, insomnia, move, wedding, funeral, new baby, etc.) that is causing you to feel these awful feelings, emotions and possibly thoughts?
I just found this on a website...it reminded me of myself when I am "sick" (defined "loosely" however you want, whether from illness, lack of sleep, negative life event, chemical imbalance, menstruating...whatever).
“As you get sick, as you become drawn in more and more by depression [or sadness], you lose that perspective. Events do become more irritating, you feel more frustrated about getting things done. You feel angrier, you feel sadder, everything's magnified in an abnormal way.”
—Paul Gottlieb, Publisher